[cutbuddie]

My completely stupid mother is not helping the least bit for what's been going on lately. I just wish I could stand up to her but I can't. She's bossy, nosey, prejudice, unfair, she doesn't listen, she wants everything to go her way and it's just completely stupid. She thinks what I'm going through is a complete joke and none of it is true. And like really? I just hate how she is, really, she's never been there for me. She's never told me I played nice piano or come to my school plays. Nothing. She just goes to work and comes home. And she always picks on me to do dishes or laundry everyday. Not even my older sister, not even when she's grounded.
My dad on the other hand. He's always been there. Supported me 100%. Paid for my counselling, medication, everything. He does everything just to see me happy.
When ever they fight or not really fighting it's just her bossing him around and him taking her stupid crap. I just want to yell at her to just shove it for once. I just want to cover my ears and block her out. I don't like listening to any of it at all.

[Perna]

I'm sorry you're feeling unsupported by your mom and having a rough time with her. Only a few more years and you will be a bit more free of your family and able to make your own decisions.

[Leed]

Hi ~ I'm sorry you feel the way you do about your Mom. Can I just ask a few questions?

Do you think that your Mom is tired when she comes home from work?
Does your Dad work?
Why do you think your Mom "bosses" your Dad around? Do you think that if she didn't, that your Dad would get those things done??
Would you do the dishes or laundry if she didn't ask?
In what way is she nosy and prejudice?

Some of these things are what Mothers DO. Alot of times Mothers have to be the ones that get things "going" in the house because if THEY don't "boss" then nothing ever gets done. The Fathers' don't care about the housework as a rule. Most Fathers would live in a pig sty and be happy. LOL And since Mom works outside the home, she has a RIGHT to have help around the house!! It would be different if she wasn't working. But she is. It would NOT be fair if she had to come home and do ALL the housework too! You're old enough now to HELP around the house. And yes, your sister should help too -- why doesn't she - or does she and you just didn't put it down?

I'm not trying to be mean honey -- you're just like ANY teenager. Teens HATE to have to help around the house. LOL I've never seen one that liked it. But just try to be fair about it, ok?? And don't be so hard on Mom. She's just trying to keep the household going FOR YOU KIDS. Give her a break, ok? If she wasn't working, you couldn't afford all the nice things you have.

Take care honey - and give Mom a hug once in awhile and tell her thanks. Hugs, Lee

[cutbuddie]

I love doing house work but when she naggs at me like that constantly. We never talk unless it's to tell me what to do. Like I really do like doing housework, laundry and cleaning and stuff. It's just yea, like it would be awesome if she was like you know those awesome super sweet moms who are like "hey, come help me do dishes" and it's really like fun because your with your mom and you guys are like dancing and singing along with the radio.
My auntie is like that. She always wants to know what's going on in my life and how things are going and all that.
And actually I barely get anything because we spend all our money on our house.
Well my parents don't get along at all. And yea, he would get it done. He just has too much to do now and she just piles it on his plate.

[cbbbeeyoko]

Maybe she feels like she always has to 'boss' you around, because you want to clean and do house work, when it's convenient for you and not for her. She expects you to do your work as her daughter, and she wants it on her time schedule not yours. maybe try doing something nice for her, like having the house work done before she returns home from work, maybe she'd appreciate it, and feel less stressed coming home to a nice clean house, that way you two could talk or spend time together when she has a lot less on her plate.

[cutbuddie]

My relationship has improved alot since I've been hospitalized and such. I'm really glad because now I'm friends with her and I can talk to her and all that mother-daughter stuff She's now my personal trainer in loosing some weight. I haven't mistreated her at all, and I love her to death. <3

[SophiaG]

Originally Posted by cutbuddie

she's never been there for me. She's never told me I played nice piano or come to my school plays. Nothing. And she always picks on me to do dishes or laundry everyday. Not even my older sister, not even when she's grounded.

Hm, sounds like she's not the supportive type and I do think there seems to be a double-standard with her expecting you to do chores and not your sister.

Hello, cutbuddie. I am glad your relationship with your mother has improved. Having both parents there to support you is good.

[Nola22]

Originally Posted by cutbuddie

My relationship has improved alot since I've been hospitalized and such. I'm really glad because now I'm friends with her and I can talk to her and all that mother-daughter stuff She's now my personal trainer in loosing some weight. I haven't mistreated her at all, and I love her to death. <3

That's really heartening news that your relationship with your mom is on the mend, and even enjoyable now. I'm very happy for you, cutbuddie! Thank you for the update, and keep up the good work.

[SophiaG]

Originally Posted by cutbuddie

My relationship has improved alot since I've been hospitalized and such. I'm really glad because now I'm friends with her and I can talk to her and all that mother-daughter stuff She's now my personal trainer in loosing some weight. I haven't mistreated her at all, and I love her to death. <3

That's good things have improved. I just read your hospitalization thread. Maybe part of the strain between you two had partly to do with your mental-Health going downhill?

[IceCreamKid]

I'm going to suggest this to you. You can decide if any of it applies to your home. When you mother comes home from work, she is probably tired. It's hard to work a job and then come home and work the other job: that of running a household. Anyone old enough to write what you did is old enough to contribute by helping with the laundry and dishes and other chores. Unless your sister is severely disabled, there is no reason why she shouldn't help, too, since she lives in the house. If she doesn't -- and I had a sibling who didn't have to; I seriously suggest you (and I know this will be hard) just get over it, do the chores you are able to do, and resolve that when you grow up and make your own home, you won't be unfair to people. I think you need to know one other thing. People usually have roles in families. They are frequently not equal. If your father is all about the love and seeing to your emotional support and being the great parent, and whatnot, and the only thing you can say about your mother is that she works, then the roles both your parents are playing are the ones they have assigned themselves and each other. If you want more love and attention from your mother, reach out to her. If she rebuffs you -- and this will be hard, but not accepting a reality is in the long run more difficult that accepting one, chalk your mother's indifference up to experience, and know that it isn't your fault. It could be that because your father is Daddy Greatest, mom is shoved off away from her children, and this role of indifferent working mother may not be entirely of her choosing.

Hello again, cutbuddie. In an ideal world all parents would be wonderful and no illness would plague us. You have done well to get healthier and could use the support of both parents. It is also true that life is unfair. Even so, you have the choice about how you react to unfairness. Perhaps you could talk about your concerns with your treatment team?

Hold your head up, cutbuddie. I wish you well.