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#1
Oct 23, 2003, 03:02 PM
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I thought this was interesting.
Heidu Codependent Pattern Behavior Cares for others rather than self Invested in being a helper Inability to say No to requests for help Drawn to people who need help. Tries to be savior of troubled people. Women Who Love Too Much. May avoid doing anything that may make others feel uncomfortable May try to keep peace between others, placater, go-between Feels guilty for not doing enough to help others Social Change Behavior Burned-out activist who sacrifices for the cause Feels responsible for solving world’s problems Feels guilty for not doing enough to save the planet Motivation/Core Issues Responsibility for Others Conditional valuing of caretaking behavior Compensation for deficiency, attempt to get contact by caretaking, hope that people will give back Origins Parents shaped caretaking behavior toward siblings Parent expected and trained child to take care of her, relied on child as confidant The only value the child felt was through caretaking Sibling or parent was in need Parentified child Child blamed for parent’s or family’s troubles Opposite reaction to neglectful or depriving parent Internalization of codependent parent Statement I care about people Unconscious Thought My only value comes from caring for others Representations Self: Caretaking, responsible for other’s happiness Other: Inadequate, in need Sees Others As People to be taken care of Healthy Capacities Blocked Individuation, responsibility Gender and Culture More common in women, therapists Part of traditional female conditioning Activating Conditions People who are in pain, difficulty, or need People who are young, poor, emotionally disturbed, medically ill The codependent person may even seek out such people Taken from: http://www.earley.org/Patterns/codependent.htm When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us.- Alexander Graham Bell
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There is a time in life when you stop existing and start living. There is a time in life when you are given a new chance and new dreams. There is a time in life when the old is to be forgotten and the new embraced. There is a time in life......And that time is now. Unknown |
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#2
Oct 23, 2003, 04:20 PM
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I struggle with codependency issues a lot, ("yeah, ya think Peanut?"
 ). Good post, ((((Heidu)))). XOXO!<font color=blue>HI FROM PEANUT</font color=blue> 
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#3
Oct 23, 2003, 04:24 PM
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That was just plain freaky. It describes me perfectly. Except the part about feeling responsible to save the world - I wouldn't take it THAT far!
Thanks Heidu - I'm going to look into this a bit more. Hopefully I will be able to learn more about me. LMo We are ALL going to be a-ok!
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