 |
| FAQ/Help |
| Calendar |
| Search |
|
#1
Nov 16, 2005, 06:20 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
I'm curious about something. If something that is only an annoyance to you causes a much more serious reaction in someone you'd consider a friend, do you feel obligated to inflate your reaction as well?
Personally, I think it's unfair to the person who isn't getting upset to be expected to feign as much distress as the other person. Acknowledging that the other person is distressed is fine, but when you have to pretend to be just as upset then I think that's beyond the call of friendship. I don't think I should have to inflate my blood pressure and anxiety level just so someone else isn't alone in their mental misery. Just my opinion.
__________________
If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space! Rondeau |
|
#2
Nov 16, 2005, 06:32 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
WI, I think you're right, and it's all about boundaries. You have the right idea. I have friends with whom I empathize deeply and to whom I give loving feedback, trying to be caring and helpful, but I also have learned to take care of my own emotional health in doing so.
Seeker Patty |
|
#3
Nov 16, 2005, 06:33 PM
|
||||
|
||||
 
__________________
 dottie |
|
#4
Nov 16, 2005, 06:34 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Acknowledging that the other person is distressed is fine, but when you have to pretend to be just as upset then I think that's beyond the call of friendship. </div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> I agree absolutely 100%...
__________________
"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
|
#5
Nov 16, 2005, 06:42 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Thank you all. I was hoping I wasn't being out of line, but sometimes when you're part of the equation you don't see things as clearly.
__________________
If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space! Rondeau |
|
#6
Nov 16, 2005, 06:47 PM
|
|||
|
|||
|
why bother feeling that you have to inflate your reactions? isn't that being untruthful?
|
|
#7
Nov 16, 2005, 10:56 PM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Yup what everyone else said
|
|
#8
Nov 17, 2005, 12:17 AM
|
|||
|
|||
|
i deeply believe that being truthful with friends is the most important gift that you can give them.
|
|
#9
Nov 17, 2005, 12:32 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
|
|
#10
Nov 17, 2005, 03:26 AM
|
||||
|
||||
|
Hi Wi,
I agree. Also there is something worse that can happen to us on this theme. Sometimes if we are around someone who gets very distressed, we catch it off them like a kind of virus. You see it all the time. People are very uncomfortable around a really distressed person. I once saw someone having a bad panic attack in college, and everyone in the room was upset. They were either gathered around the unfortunate person offering (useless) advice or they were out of there. Everyone in the room looked scared, embarrassed, uncomfortable. IMHO fear is catching; it's like chickens in a hen coop when the fox is prowling. Cheers, M |
|
#11
Nov 17, 2005, 09:54 AM
|
|||
|
|||
|
I most definately agree with you on this, and it is an excellent topic you brought here.
Take care now, DE ((((((((((((((( wi )))))))))))))))))
__________________
|
| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
|
Similar Threads
|
||||
| Thread | Forum | |||
| anyone else's T away? | Psychotherapy | |||
| How to deal with someone else's anxiety? | Anxiety, Panic and Phobias | |||
| Serious Distress! | Other Mental Health Discussion | |||
| Financial Distress | Depression | |||
My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
Linear Mode
