[cms39]

We finally decided not to spend any time with my husband's family for Thanksgiving or Christmas. That may sound un thankful or not in the Christmas spirit, but we have tried. We have endured hurt enough. My husband is much happier. He just forgets about it. I, on the other hand, have done a little ruminating, which has been a little less lately.

I feel slightly responsible - since I believe a little gossiping on my part may have caused them to act the way they are (shunning us). I guess I think people should talk about their problems openly. I do about mine. But I have to remember they want to keep secrets.

[cms39]

Ok. I know. There's no excuse for gossiping. I don't make it a habit. I guess I just shouldn't know some stuff. I don't think sometimes.

[Lexicon78]

It happens every once in awhile. I wouldn't worry about it. I know how it is when families don't get along. I know mine don't. Like I know my brother and his girlfriend won't come see the family for Christmas, and they didn't come for Thanksgiving. It's a shame but that's how he wants it and sometimes that's how it has to be. Do what you think is best for your own good.

[cms39]

Thank you Lexicon.

[SpazKatt]

cms I know how it is, we didn't spend thanksgiving with my mother's family and it was really great to have thanksgiving with friends and no gossip. Btw please don't feel badly about it, it seems as though that you have done all you can and things just arent changing. Do what is best for yourselves there is no use in two unhappy parties and it's thier loss anyhow. *hugs* (I know the feeling)

[kimmydawn]

cms, it sounds like a decision has been made here and for a smooth holiday season, it might be the best.

i would just take time to let things die down and heal, if possible. Hopefully you'll have a beautiful, peaceful holiday season.

best to you and yours.

KD

[cms39]

Thank you, Kimmy.

And the Chinese proverb you quote is wonderful. It's also used by the Christophers. Have you ever heard of them?