[idgaf]

i can talk to people but i cant get close to people. i forgot how. i've had best friends before but we all wen t separate ways.. i closed up completely at the end of high school and have been that way eversince. like i just dont trust anyone.

people are all really detached and ingenuine and its a really ugly combo I see a LOT lately.

My main problem is being comfortable being alone too.

how do i give people the benefit of the doubt? its very logical to be hyper-vigilant around people. i was criticized for everything eversince i can remember, including by fam.

yeah maybe i am overly negative these days but when people are detached and fake i just don't know why bother

im not the kind of person that unloads and is all weird when you first meet them. I just hate insincerity. but i haven't had a real friend in ages. i've moved too much and had to know way too many people in a short amount of time. I put on a mask all the time for too long. I guess i take a while to open up maybe? i dont know

i never stayed long enough with anyone to get to make friends in years. like im actually afraid of getting close now. for some bizarre reason. because i've been relocating and relocating thats what i became used to.

it would be too good to be true if i made a super friend or boyfriend that was FOREAL. So far all of my boyfriends have been eh not for me, and the guys i really love get away.

im not idealistic. i dont want perfection, just real friends
How do i stop being afraid to get close to people? How did that happen ? Im so confused

[shazza]

Hi idgaf, i have just logged back on, for the second time today, mainly due to bordem and feeling restless. No disrespect to this site, as i'm a new member and i'm so glad i found it ! I was reading your post and i can so relate to all that you have said. I to tend to put what i call a barrier up, as that way i don't tend to get hurt, it's like things tend to bounce off, eg
they don't bother me as much. The downside to me doing this is i don't find it easy to display affection and find it hard to connect with people.
At times i do let my guard down, show affection, share a laugh, but eventually it's like a spanner will be thrown in the works and i come crashing down. I also like genuine people who can be themselves sometime's we don't allways like what they say but at least you get to know the people that they truly are. I feel that society is changing so much, to me it's like some people are only mainly concerned about looking after themselves. At times life can be tough for anyone, We are all different, I use to work in Aged Care as a Diversonial Therapist, and it was a job that i really liked because i really like helping and looking after people. We seem to live in a world where people are just so busy, would'nt it be nice if we had some balance in our day to day lives and we could all spend even just a small amount of genuine time for each other. So I'm sorry that you feel the way you do and i can only imagine how it must be for you, as i also feel the same way. Wish i knew what to do, I do wish you the very best.

[idgaf]

Originally Posted by shazza

Hi idgaf, i have just logged back on, for the second time today, mainly due to bordem and feeling restless. No disrespect to this site, as i'm a new member and i'm so glad i found it ! I was reading your post and i can so relate to all that you have said. I to tend to put what i call a barrier up, as that way i don't tend to get hurt, it's like things tend to bounce off, eg
they don't bother me as much. The downside to me doing this is i don't find it easy to display affection and find it hard to connect with people.
At times i do let my guard down, show affection, share a laugh, but eventually it's like a spanner will be thrown in the works and i come crashing down. I also like genuine people who can be themselves sometime's we don't allways like what they say but at least you get to know the people that they truly are. I feel that society is changing so much, to me it's like some people are only mainly concerned about looking after themselves. At times life can be tough for anyone, We are all different, I use to work in Aged Care as a Diversonial Therapist, and it was a job that i really liked because i really like helping and looking after people. We seem to live in a world where people are just so busy, would'nt it be nice if we had some balance in our day to day lives and we could all spend even just a small amount of genuine time for each other. So I'm sorry that you feel the way you do and i can only imagine how it must be for you, as i also feel the same way. Wish i knew what to do, I do wish you the very best.

i always feel like im missing something because i had best friends before, now i dont

maybe the goal should be to have a bunch of busy people as friends~ so you can rotate them every weekend >>

still somehow people's cold and detached rubbed onto me ugh. i dont think its normal, theres something better if you keep trying. there has to be something being missed im just temporarily nuts maybe