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  #1  
Old Jan 18, 2012, 05:54 PM
Unrealityfeeling Unrealityfeeling is offline
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Member Since: Feb 2011
Location: Norway
Posts: 32
Hello!
So,some basic info..
I have been with my girlfriend for 3 months now..
It all started out really good, Im the type of boy who does everything my girlfriend tells me to, Im the type of boy who get jealous, but doesn't say anything, I enjoy making my girl smile, I do everything for her.. I wish I could be with her 24/7! But the thing is..
She does never ask me if I want to do something, I'm the one who have to ask. She doesn't say good night anymore..
And when iam with her, im so nervous, im so scared of doing anything wrong.
because she is very talented when it comes to naggin'. When I do something wrong, she tells me. ofcourse its okay that she tells me when i do things wrong.
but, she says i have to stop saying sorry, and thank you, so much.. And when Im with her, she mostly lay on the sofa sleeping.. Once I tried to wake her up.. she got very angry. and 5 minutes later, her phone rang. she answered it and was happy.. then went to sleep again.. I do everything my girlfriend, I even gave up my job, school and my plans for her.. and she doesn't want to offer anything for me, she told me "you will not stand in my way" She is also really in love with daniell radcliffe, and all these handsome boys you see on TV, she even sais she will marry them one day.. im like.. what about me?! ahh
I don't know if I can stand being threated like **** anymore.. But its so hard to do something, because she is pregnant.. and I want the child to be happy.
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Last edited by Unrealityfeeling; Jan 18, 2012 at 06:13 PM.

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  #2  
Old Jan 18, 2012, 07:18 PM
Ygrec23's Avatar
Ygrec23 Ygrec23 is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2010
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,853
Hello, Unreality,

I really have to wonder if this lady is for you. From what you say she says to you I'm rather doubtful. It's only too very, very possible that someone can be very much in love with another person who doesn't really love them. And you would not be doing anyone a favor (either you, the lady or the baby) if you marry her when she doesn't love you.

If she tells you all the time to stop saying you're sorry or thank you, if she spends most of your time together sleeping on the sofa, if she's angry when you wake her up and then happy to take someone else's phone call, if you've given up your job, school and plans for her, and she doesn't really respond very well, my friend, even though I've never met you, my very dear friend, this young lady is not, I'm only too sure, the right one for you.

That may be tough to take, hard to hear. Difficult to swallow and absorb. But never, ever, ever marry someone who isn't right for you. And the young woman you describe very much sounds like someone who isn't right for you.

It doesn't matter if she's carrying your baby. Maybe it's yours and maybe it's not. But even if it is, the two of you are better off apart than in an unloving marriage, which is worse than hell. Back off, lad, distance yourself from her. She sounds, from what you say, like a very selfish person indeed. And selfish people, male or female, most assuredly do NOT make decent marriage partners.

You specifically asked for advice here, setting forth your own observations and experiences. What I'm saying to you is simply a response to what you yourself have said and written. I haven't made up anything else myself. I have no axe to grind with women or young people. I'm just giving you a straight, honest answer: Don't marry this young woman. You'll be making a HUGE mistake for which you will later be very, very sorry.

Take care!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unrealityfeeling View Post
Hello! So,some basic info.. I have been with my girlfriend for 3 months now.. It all started out really good, Im the type of boy who does everything my girlfriend tells me to, Im the type of boy who get jealous, but doesn't say anything, I enjoy making my girl smile, I do everything for her.. I wish I could be with her 24/7! But the thing is.. She does never ask me if I want to do something, I'm the one who have to ask. She doesn't say good night anymore.. And when iam with her, im so nervous, im so scared of doing anything wrong. because she is very talented when it comes to naggin'. When I do something wrong, she tells me. of course its okay that she tells me when i do things wrong. but, she says i have to stop saying sorry, and thank you, so much.. And when Im with her, she mostly lay on the sofa sleeping.. Once I tried to wake her up.. she got very angry. and 5 minutes later, her phone rang. she answered it and was happy.. then went to sleep again.. I do everything my girlfriend, I even gave up my job, school and my plans for her.. and she doesn't want to offer anything for me, she told me "you will not stand in my way" She is also really in love with daniell radcliffe, and all these handsome boys you see on TV, she even sais she will marry them one day.. im like.. what about me?! ahh I don't know if I can stand being threated like **** anymore.. But its so hard to do something, because she is pregnant.. and I want the child to be happy.
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We must love one another or die.
W.H. Auden
We must love one another AND die.
Ygrec23
  #3  
Old Jan 18, 2012, 08:03 PM
JLarissaDragon's Avatar
JLarissaDragon JLarissaDragon is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2011
Location: Oregon
Posts: 898
It sounds like she is using you and disrespecting you as well. I am wondering if she is really stuck on herself and what she wants. That is a rather no win situation for you and you seem to be reduced to "walking on eggs" to keep her happy. From the point of view of a woman, you sound like you are a caring, and compassionate person that many girls would love to be around. Take care of yourself and realize that you have needs that also need to be met if a relationship is to be successful
If the baby that she is carrying is actually yours, that complicates matters somewhat. I would have a long talk with her and find out where you stand, but be careful of a relationship that is one sided
  #4  
Old Jan 19, 2012, 09:53 AM
Alizarasky0315 Alizarasky0315 is offline
Junior Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2012
Location: Virginia
Posts: 10
I agree completely with JLarissaDragon. This is a big Red Flag. Don't set yourself up for a world of hurt... I've been in a similar situation before. Trust me it's better to end it now while you're not completely in over your head then to let this go on for years. It's only been 3 months.. if the issue isn't fixed what will 3 years look like?;In the same breath however.. Take care of your kid and try to work it out for your child.
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