[dpadilla89]

i find this hysterical, really i seriously do..

these past three weeks have been amazing for me, i have been going out on weekends, getting high and drunk for the first time, socializing with practically everybody in my high school-mostly (yup, all 84 kids haha), and finding out that NOW--9 people i think like me.

first how i found out that the first guy liked me was when this guy chris kept talking to me during science class, math class, lunch and in the hallways like every minute of the day. lol. When he was 'hosting' a new student that would be coming to the high school next year, from the middle school. He didnt even know this guy he was showing around, and he pointed to me and told him he liked me and then told this girl amanda whose kinda popular, pretty and really nice that he likes me. Today he right away picked me for doing a project together. Hes nice, but i dont really like him that way.

The other guy i find out who liked me, i think is RJ. Hes really nice, really flirty and really friendly. Its cool, but hes always like as my friend Keith says, stalking me everywhere. lol. So everyone says its kind of obvious.

Then I found out that this guy Scott likes me. He asked for my screen name that same week and then IMed me right away and we started talking. He told me he liked me, left comments on my myspace saying im sexy and beautiful, etc. Asked me to go to prom with him later on the days, asked if we could hold hands, kiss, and go to the mall or a movie. heh. He's kinda odd and strange. heh.

Then my friend Dion, whose really cool, nice, funny and pretty cute, asked me to the prom and i said yes. Hes been one of my friends and hes kinda cute, really nice but ALSO hes a player. I wasnt to sure weather to go with him or not, but it could be fun. Today, at school we had a town meeting like a meeting with the entire school, therapists and princ. He kept talking to me, making me laugh, and then said hes unsure how to ask me out, but kept telling me hes joking on and off. his friend and my friend said that he likes me.
Today also he liked..followed me everywhere since i got into school, or at least was talking to me constantly.
I might like him...although, wait till the end of the problem/issue..heh.

Then my friend Justin whose liked me for about over a year now who lives in the town next to me, has asked me out a few times, bought me dinner several times and thoughtful cards anda bday gifts. Hes cool and all, but i dont like him like that either. At one point i thought i did, but it was all in my head. haha. Why i dont like him? Hes going to an Ivy league school, brand new 2006 mustang and hes rich, not that i dont like that but hes too stuck up, has good expectations of everything and everyone. I really dont like him for that whatsoever.

Then theres Sunny, who i guess likes me and his Dion's best friend. heh. Supp. he just wants to smoke me up and then mess around with me. But, hes werid too, and seems VERY violent considering he beat up a kid at my school last year and is pressed with charges now. lol. But, i DO NOT like him at all.

Then there is Kyle, a guy from my school who is on my bus and for the past two days he didnt stop looking at me and when i looked he turned his face. Then when i was almost home, he asked me out of the blue--would i like to go out sometime. i said i wanted to become friends better first, etc. lol. Hes nice and cool, but not my type either. It kinda was strange, considering that hes the only other person on my bus and i was like friends with him before, i didnt expect this coming at all.

Then theres this guy Alex. Hes cool, and nice. He has a girlfriend but he was telling people that i looked cute and if he was single he would bang and be with me, haha. He starts to talk to me now, and i never was friends with him before, its wierd. He bums me a cigg. once in a while too before school starts, but there nasty camels. heh.

Then theres this girl, lol, Lilly. Shes nice, and she was my friend. Now, she told me she liked me and wanted to be with me, she already knows im gay/or bi. But, i didnt like her like that because it would be wierd going out with a good friend like she was, and shes not attractive in any way. lol. sorry to say-. I was flattered and thought about going with her--but i decided not to. My best friend Tara IMed her and told her not to be mad at me, etc. Shes pissed, like you wouldnt believe. She cant trust me anymore because of my friend?!?! thats dumb, sorry to say. Not my fault, and i tried explaining that to her. Shes going out with this guy Tom now, shockingly. Shes been like in love with this kid forever and now there going out. lol. Although, were no longer friends anymore..soo i can care less. lol.

I find this ALL really weird and odd. haha, yeah i do. I mean, i really dont know what to do, i never been liked so much in my life by anyone before, and i do think that Dion is cute, and was considering going out with him and all but, I kinda want a girlfriend right now. heh. I never been with a girl before, but have many thoughts and the attraction is unbelievable. I really dont know what to do now because i dont want to regret loosing friends with anybody, not hurting anybodys feelings, and not regret going out or even going to prom with dion if he finds out this, because hes really awesome. I dont want to loose this chance, and not regret anything afterwards, you know?? lol. Well, i mean, how do i tell them that i dont like them without revealing my sexuality prefrence(s) or just in general, and how do i pick and choose, and what do i def. do about the girl situation-how i want a girlfriend more right now. heh?? its very confusing to me, and akward at the same time that i keep finding out that all these guys/girl like me. lol. idkk, life is full of surprises as they say. and this is going to be a surprise since i really dont know what to do, haha. Any advice for me?? Advice would be ALOT more helpful and appreachiated. :]

thanks everybody.

deb.

PS-- I have family therapy at 5pm today. This might get brought up like i mean, guys and people liking me and how amazing my weeks have been. lol. The problem though?? My therapist, the one i have a crush on..it will feel way akward to tell her and especially since she knows i like girls too, maybe even more then guys, heh. What do i do about that too?? lol..thanks..!

[Lexicon78]

It's always great when people come out of the woodwork and reveal that they like you, isn't it? I know it would be completely and totally tempting and easy to go out with any one of those guys that like you, but sad enough they are NOT what you want...you've said that already.

You want a woman who you find attractive and who is compatible with you. My suggestion would be to keep searching for her. I know that can be quite frustrating at times to just keep searching, but I wouldn't want you to settle for something you didn't really want.

When I'm with someone and it becomes known that someone else likes me, no matter how good the relationship I'm in, I always end up ruining everything and going after the new person. Why? I can't stand it if I can't have someone who's into me. It's like I have to experience it. Don't do that...it's a really bad idea. I'm trying not to do that in the relationship I'm in now.

You deserve to have someone who likes you for you and who you WANT.

[LMo]

Hey, when you're hot, you're hot!

And nothing makes you more attractive than being disinterested... don't know why that is :S

[dottie]

This really concerns me. Drinking and getting high are negative modes of opening up and being accepted by a group.

All of the horrible things which have happened to people under the influence. Please give this a thought. I speak from experience, unfortunately! I am a 58 yr/o woman that should be dead many time over.Very near misses!!

Take good care!!

[Rhapsody]

HMM -

Not for sure about....... the mixture of this new found ACCEPTANCE.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

[LMo]

Actually, I hadn't noticed that part. Thank you Dottie... you are absolutely right. Shame on me for bypassing that part of the message and cheering her on. I was referring to the last bit about her feeling good about the attention she's getting.

[bebop]

honestly I don't even like to see post like this from teens. sorry but kids just don't realize how bad they are hurting themselves with this kind of behavior.

[dpadilla89]

lol, thanks everybody. :]

i dont think ill be getting high though again really..maybe drink once in a while..i made a commitment to myself. :] for lent, too. haha. well....thanks..bye!

deb

[Lexicon78]

Drinking, smoking, or any kind of drug use is a bad idea, especially for those who are underage. Trust me, I know from experience!

I started smoking when I was 11. I regret ever starting. It's one of the hardest things to quit, IMO. Drinking can really mess you up and expose you to many serious risks, not only to your health but also to many other dangerous situations. The same goes for any type of drug.

[dpadilla89]

i know..i know...lol.

but like, what do i do about my 'guy' situation?? help!!!!!

[Rhapsody]

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dpadilla89 said:
lol, thanks everybody. :]

i dont think ill be getting high though again really..maybe drink once in a while..i made a commitment to myself. :] for lent, too. haha. well....thanks..bye!

deb

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LoVe,
Rhapsody -

[SeptemberMorn]

Be just friends until you know what they REALLY want from you. If you've displayed "easy" behavior while you've been under the influence, that may be the secret to your new-found friendships. Not a good start!