[tinathatcher]

I feel like I have no one to talk to.. it sucks me and my wife got married last October. But have had issues from the begging. She is 10 months sober tomorrow and I have 2 days clean. We have been through a lot together, so much that it is hard to tell if there is too much water under the bridge. My wife was always complaining about me not being intimate enough and not wanting her "that" way. I do I always have but sometimes in the past it was just such a hassle that I stooped trying and so did she. She told me tonight that she doesn't know if she wants to work things out and that she needs some space.. I am sleeping on the couch right now. I miss her and I miss what we were and I miss us being happy together. I have never done any thing to betray her trust and she has never fully cheated on me.. but she has talked to other women on more then one occassion. She tells me and has been telling me for a while that she is bored in this relationship. I never knew what to do so I never did any thing. So now I am trying to do things different and she wants to know why now? Why all of a sudden am I making an effort? I honestly don't know. It could be because I feel like I'm losing her but I have felt like that before.. so why now? Yesterday she *** all happy and was so ready for things to be different and we were both excited to move on in our lives and today she doesn't know what she wants.... we had a pretty good day today but I started a conversation aboutsomething I over heard her say on the phone to someone else. And it started off okay. Then now we are sleeping in separate rooms and all I want is to be by her side sleeping next to her.

Sorry to write so much burning have a lot to say and no one tonlisten.. it feels better to let it out tho... thank you to anyone for reading this...

[Perna]

I hope you got some sleep and today things look different and you all are talking again. Stay clean! It can take time to work out things and I hope you all keep trying.

[Leed]

Why not just go sleep with her? You are married ya know. LOL Even if you just "sleep" it would be a start. Just being close to each other is good.

Take things slowly, and see what happens. Keep talking -- sounds like you two haven't really communicated. You've gotta keep the lines open between you.

I wish you the very best. Like Perna said, it takes time. I hope your wife will be patient. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee

[Open Eyes]

Maybe you should both go to some AA meetings together. Keep staying sober, it has only been a couple of days for you, keep at it, work on you now.

Open Eyes

[fromGreenland]

I'm sorry I'm just going to jump on a conclusion here.
Sounds to me that there has been ALOT of drama in your relationship and when you finally "don't do anything" she gets bored.
I've had that psychological problem of graving for drama. I am still trying to get out of it. Before I read a book about my condition I couldn't stand a week without my doses of anxiety, struggle to overcome something and the adrenalin in it. I've been fighting my need of drama for a year now and I still get the feeling of "boredom" when nothing bad has happened for a while. But all this is triggered by my childhood where there has been violence, death of a family member and alcoholism.
So I'm saying that MAYBE your wife has that? She is ten months sober and you're becoming clean and she's bored and is talking about giving your relationship up. Have you considered couples counselling?

I'm sorry if all this don't make sense, I just think that every big action digs deep into the roots.

Wish you all the best, sounds like you truly love your wife <3

Heidi.