[extremeloathing]

Why is it so ridiculously hard to keep good, solid friends? I don't understand why every person I once considered a brother has either screwed me over, betrayed me, threw me under the bus, or just stopped contacting me altogether - sometimes for no reason whatsoever? It's horrible and the pain never really goes away, albeit I've found better ways to deal with it.

Okay, not every person I know has done this to me but more often than not it actually does happen and, like I said, the pain never really goes away. I'm assuming the frequencies at which my heart and soul heal aren't even close to that of my failing friendships. I've questioned this so many times - as to the reasons why - and I began analyzing myself to find out if there's something I'm doing wrong. What am I doing that's pushing people away? Do I come off as arrogant? Angry? Yeah, okay, I feel these emotions, the latter being pretty scary sometimes, but I don't drag the world down with them, let alone my friends or the people I care about for that matter. Well, at least I don't think I do!

I know people come and go, it's a hard lesson I've learned over the years, and I've come to terms with it. However, when each and every one of my friendships ends in failure, I can't help but to be cynical and a skeptic about starting any kind of relationship. I'm sure some of you guys can relate or maybe you have something that could help? Anything would be cool...

Weird because I feel the exact same way, except about romantic relationships, but I think I know where your frustrations are coming from. Personally, I still don't see the need for a platonic relationship, since they seem inferior to romantic ones to me…?

Anyhow, I think what the issue might be is that it can be incredibly painful for a man to be thought of as a "brother." I have strong feelings for my best friend, whom is female, but she has told me she doesn't feel like that for me, which means I ultimately sit on the sidelines watching her fall in love and find better individuals than me while I remain alone and longing for a relationship. It's unrequited love and rejection to some men . It can feel like being invisible to a woman when in this situation.

I can find it hard to be thought of as a "brother" and forever lacking the same intimacy and feelings of a relationship. The difference for me is that I value her more than that and have mentally concluded that I am not lovable and won't find a woman that can feel like that for me; loneliness is all I have known and I don't expect that to change despite how hard it is .

There are numerous websites on the Internet that say if a woman "friend zones" you that you might as well leave and stop talking to them because you'll never be thought as anything worthy, or at least that is my interpretation of what I've read.

Hope this helped some