[Jadek]

Hi all,

I single mum of 2, separated from my partner of 11 years. I asked him to leave and he always made me known he wanted to come back. Separated for 1 year now. The last couple of weeks I kept thinking about him and consider if we should be back together? What is the rate of successful after separation?

Thanks for your time.
Jade

[Lexicon78]

In all my relationships that I've separated and gotten back together with someone, it has never worked out. A lot of people think that the next time will be different, but it never is. The same problems are still there and the same worries. Unless both of you are truly willing to work really hard the next time around I wouldn't suggest getting back together.

Hi Jade,
I think it depends on the relationship. Also the factors involved in the breakup.

I believe that things can be better the second time around, since both partners can learn from the experiences of the first time, mistakes made,etc. But like Lex said, both partners have to be willing to work at it.

Whatever your choice, I hope things work out well for you!

Sujin

[Jadek]

Hi Lex,

Thanks for your reply. Your are right he didn't change. I went to see him and realised he's not the man for me and decide to remain friend. He want to be back together but want me to change for him. Write back when you have time.

Jade

[tracylee]

I tried that and it was ok for a while but then it got horrid, worse than the first time we split up, imo, i think its best not to go there and just remember the good bits!! Huggles

[Jadek]

Hi Sujin,

Thanks for your reply and wish.

[Rhapsody]

Please check this website out - it has been of great help to ME and my 20-year marriage.... the book for MEN ONLY is coming out this month.

LINK: http://4-womenonly.com/home.aspx


LoVe,
Rhapsody -

[Lexicon78]

I'm glad you realized that he wouldn't change. I know it's tough when you want something but come to realize it wouldn't work out anyways.

[LILITH]

Hello Jadek, I know because of my Domestic Violence work that an ex is an ex for a reason. Most likely people don't change. It only sets up for a lot of heart ache in the end. You can't change someone. They are the only ones capable of doing it. You have survived for a year without him. I imagine it has been difficult. A lot of womyn think they can not survive on their own. But you can. I am not saying your case is of Domestic Violence, but the criteria is often the same. Just be careful.... good luck with what ever decision you make.
PM me if you would like.
Altheia

[Jadek]

Hi Altheia,

Thank you for your comments. When you are confused it's hard but with some support thing seem to get easier.