Single Parent' Son seeing F., birth father in SC

I need wisdom to claim my nerves. My son will leave to meet F. after church. He has not seen or heard from F. in over 16 years. My son's grandparents, on both sides, have passed away. F.'s mother passed on New Year's Eve. We had a small memorial service here, since F. did not have anything in Maryland. F. almost talked me into taking him to Maryland. Everyone thought I was crazey to consider it. Begin with, I felt sorry about him having surgery. He did not want my son to come and I would be in the car with him for 7 hours. I had a panic attack and the few times since, after talking with him. My counselor told me to not speak with him.
I was crazy to meet F. F. had things for my son and me. F.'s father was in War World II and the Korean War. F. sent some of military service back with me.
My son's friend works for Senator DeMint. He is going to Gaffney to get F. to sign a letter for the Senator to request the medals. F.'s father had 2 Purple Hearts and a lot of other medals.
My son has learned to get wisdom from his friends, who are postive role model.
Sorry, I have to laugh at F.'s comment about his ability to show my son how to be a man. It is really the opposite, what not to be a man.
Well, his two friends will be going with him. I am intrested in their observation of F. F. did not mind them coming. I told my son that it was ok for him to see him just once. We will see F. attitude.

MMJM - this has got to be stressful for you. Hang in there. I'm glad that F has friends that can go with him, because it's probably going to be very emotional for him.

Fayerody's tagline reminds me of what you said about F showing your son how to be a man: "if you can't be a good example, then you'll have to serve as a horrible warning" or something like that.

Hang in there... your son will do fine, especially with your support and his friends.

Thanks.
Well, always a mother.

How old is your son, MM?

Funny how some men think they are "men" and we women SO disagree!

Sorry. I got busy so I would not worry. My son is 22. With some challenges, he is about 17.

MM, sounds normal to me. Those "challenges" is what will help him grow up. However, I do understand your worry. But there comes a time to say "I did my best" and let them go. When that time comes, prayer is the best medicine.

September Morn, thanks for your comments. I am glad he took two of his friends. His F. wants him to have his moped. With gas, that would be ok.
I hope F.'s attitude stays polite. J. my son will call him Sunday. If F. calls Saturday, after drinking, I will know he has not changed.