[Ferrer15]

Hi, I'm having difficulties communicating with my parents. I'm not sure what happened to me. Last year, I somehow fell into depression but I have gotten a lot better recently. I feel really good about myself now. But there are still times that I don't feel good or am just irritated. I have some weird mood swings and my parents don't seem to get that. My dad is very straight-minded. It's his way or no way. I feel like he doesn't care about my opinions and usually always puts me down. My mom, it appears, just wants me to be better so I can not be a pain in the butt.
All I ask are a few tips to how to talk with them.

[Miswimmy1]

i have the same issues. wanted to let you know that you are not alone

[Leed]

Hi ~ I would pick a time when they're both in a reasonably good mood, and ask them if they'd come and sit down with you so you could all have a talk.

I don't know how old you are, and that is going to make a difference. But I'd next telll them that I'd like them to try to treat you as a young adult, who has opinions and who would like to discuss those opinions with them AS a young adult and not as a child like them seem to think you still are. Tell them you are trying to develop your own ideas and outlooks and you'd like to discuss them with them, but they don't seem to want to listen. Say all this with MUCH respect!!! Don't argue EVEN IF THEY DO. Stay calm, and show them that you ARE growing up!!!

Tell them there are ALOT of things you want to talk to them about but you haven't had a chance because they haven't been listening.

I hope this works, but it may not. Just remember -- RESPECT. I wish you the very best.. Please let us know how thiings turn out, ok? God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee

[Jan1212]

I don't really know specifics, but you can ask for a minute of their time, or a "there's something that's been bothering me, can you listen?" Its about how you ask or act. Does your family eat together at the dinner table?

[shezbut]

Hi Ferrer,

I agree with the above 2 posts, but I'd like to add my 2 cents anyway.

As a teenager, I developed a more adult-like relationship with my parents. I showed respect, but I also didn't have to keep my thoughts to myself. When I felt hurt, scared, or angry, I had the ability to speak up. I didn't mince my words ~ but I kind of pushed it there. My parents accepted that part of me anyway.

What it got down to was me speaking up for myself. My parents kind of learned that I would do what I wanted regardless of their rules the hard way. From that point, they began listening to me. I don't advocate defying rules ~ I do encourage doing all that you can to develop a healthy relationship. They listen to you & you listen to them. RESPECT is a necessity.

Very best wishes!

Hi Ferrer15 - if you want this situation to change i feel the only option is to speak up about it. If you explain that you are still experiencing symptoms of depression and that you don't mean to behave in ways they find disagreeable perhaps they will be more patient and understanding. Remember you are not defined by your illness - you are still responsible for managing your condition and if you continue to be respectful and commited to improving the relationship you have with your parents i don't see why they would treat you like a child or disregard your concerns. All the best.

[LostMom3]

I agree that you are foing to have to anpproach them calmly and with maturity. That way they will listen to you. Have you been to the foctor about your depression and self injury? Do you see a therapist? If you see a therapist, then you can get it set up where you have family counciling. All of you would benefit from that. Try posting in our forums, you can get some support that way and that will help you overcome real life obstacles. Wishing you the best.