[GirlOfManyFaces]

I like this guy, and he really likes me. But we were adio chatting. (Sending short voice messages back and forth) and this one message sound EXACTLY like the voice of my rapist. It scared me to death. I though it was him. But it was just the guy I like. I am still crying and shaking. I'm already terrified of men. But now I can't even bare to hear a mans voice...

How can I keep a relationship with this guy? Or even just a friendship?

[hamster-bamster]

Oh dear, you need therapy for trauma ASAP. Keep the recording so you can play it in the office of your therapist.

Rape is a very serious trauma and it maims women for life if you do not take care of trauma therapy NOW.

Can you afford it? How old are you? Do you have rights to seek T alone?

[Travelinglady]

Have you seen a therapist about this issue? I'm sure you don't want to go through life avoiding men, to the point where you can't even listen to one. I do think you can have a good relationship with a man, but to me your reaction is saying that you need more healing first.

We do have people here who have been raped and I think there's still a social group of these women. You might check there and see how they have dealt with it and how they are doing. A thought, anyway...

[GirlOfManyFaces]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

Oh dear, you need therapy for trauma ASAP. Keep the recording so you can play it in the office of your therapist.

Rape is a very serious trauma and it maims women for life if you do not take care of trauma therapy NOW.

Can you afford it? How old are you? Do you have rights to seek T alone?

I can't afford it. I'm 14. I have a T but she makes things worse.
Thanks for caring enough to comment <3

[GirlOfManyFaces]

Originally Posted by PAYNE1

Have you seen a therapist about this issue? I'm sure you don't want to go through life avoiding men, to the point where you can't even listen to one. I do think you can have a good relationship with a man, but to me your reaction is saying that you need more healing first.

We do have people here who have been raped and I think there's still a social group of these women. You might check there and see how they have dealt with it and how they are doing. A thought, anyway...

I don't like talking about it. I try to avoid men. But it's impossible to completely avoid them. They're kinda everywhere.

I've been stressed to the point where I considered being a lesbian... But my heart doesn't feel that way. I don't want that.

Thank you for your suggestion<3 it is greatly appreciated.

[hamster-bamster]

Can you change the T?

If you cannot get quality trauma t, then as a last resort I would suggest desentization on your own, meaning, listening to the recording over and over again until you are no longer disturbed by it. But it is difficult to bear and quality T would be better.

[GirlOfManyFaces]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

Can you change the T?

If you cannot get quality trauma t, then as a last resort I would suggest desentization on your own, meaning, listening to the recording over and over again until you are no longer disturbed by it. But it is difficult to bear and quality T would be better.

I will ask my mum if I can get a new T.

And I would try to do that, but I don't have the recording any more.

Thank you for your help. I REALLY appreciate the support!

[hamster-bamster]

Do ask your mum. It is ok, you will get a new T who will work through this trauma with you and with time and patience you will be fine around men.

Look at it this way - you are so young but have already figured out that you are not a lesbian. So you already know a lot about who you are. Many people your age are still confused and unsure and you are certain about something that is pretty important iin our lives. So there are some positives if you start regard this realization as your big achievement.

[GirlOfManyFaces]

Originally Posted by hamster-bamster

Do ask your mum. It is ok, you will get a new T who will work through this trauma with you and with time and patience you will be fine around men.

Look at it this way - you are so young but have already figured out that you are not a lesbian. So you already know a lot about who you are. Many people your age are still confused and unsure and you are certain about something that is pretty important iin our lives. So there are some positives if you start regard this realization as your big achievement.

Well, Im not a lesbian. But I do have feelings and attractions towards girl, sometimes. But it's just a stupid teen thing. I don't ever plan on acting upon those feelings. So... You can just say I'm Bi... But it's not a problem in my life.

I just hope I can get over my fear of men quickly.

[hamster-bamster]

I hope for you as well. Let us know what your mum says.