[diona lakes]

i strive hard to find friends but i guess some friends that i have are just there because they can get something from me. i tried hard to be good to do good but it is always not enough it is always so wrong. i want to die but afraid of going to hell. everyday i wait for my sufferings to end. whenever i feel depress i punch the wall to punish myself for being so careless, stupid and inadequate for others. my parents doesn't know that i have a moderate to severe depression :'(

[hamster-bamster]

I hope your username is not your true name and if it is, then write to the moderators asking to switch to a pretend play name.

How old are you and does your doctor know about the depression?

[Leed]

Honey, you are NOT inadequate, or stupid or careless or anything else!!! That is your mind telling you those lies.

And God isn't going to send you to hell! You've TRIED to do good, and I'm SURE you have done good!! All of us make mistakes in our lives. All of us try to be and do good, but sometimes things just don't work out the way we want them to. God is NOT going to punish us if we try. God isn't a mean God. God is a loving, understanding God. And He loves YOU.

Are you SURE that your friends are there just to get something from you, or do you just mis-trust everyone? Maybe your friends are REALLY your friends!!! Maybe they really DO love you!! Have you ever thought of that?

You need to talk to your parents about your depression so that you can go to a therapist and get some treatment. You NEED to see a therapist!!! Your parents certainly won't be mad at you for your feelings and for being depressed! Please have them sit down and have a talk with them. Tell them you've been depressed for quite a while, and that you feel you need to talk to a professional. Hopefully things will work out. God bless you sweetie, and I hope we hear from you again. Take care. Hugs, Lee