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  #1  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 03:28 PM
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Miswimmy1 Miswimmy1 is offline
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There is a guy, who hardcore flirts with me. I like him a lot, and I asked him if he wanted to go out. But he said he doesn't want a relationship. Yet he continues to flirt. Is that appropriate?
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  #2  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 03:30 PM
Poppy Princess Poppy Princess is offline
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No, it isn't. You should give him the cold shoulder.
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  #3  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 03:40 PM
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kaliope kaliope is offline
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I agree. it is inappropriate to flirt, giving the message that one is interested, if that person truly isn't interested.
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kali's gallery http://forums.psychcentral.com/creat...s-gallery.htmlIs it appropriate to flirt when you are not interested in a relationship?


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  #4  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 04:20 PM
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yellowfrog268 yellowfrog268 is offline
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Hmmm.

Is he trying for a one-night (or one-off)?
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  #5  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 04:22 PM
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LadyShadow LadyShadow is offline
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No I don't think its appropriate. Sounds like he just wants a "piece"
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  #6  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 07:28 PM
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Miswimmy1 Miswimmy1 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yellowfrog268 View Post
Hmmm.

Is he trying for a one-night (or one-off)?
It doesn't matter. I'm 16.
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  #7  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 07:40 PM
Inedible Inedible is offline
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Does he behave the same way with other women or is this something he only does with you? If he acts this way toward other women, it could be just the way he behaves. If it is unique to the way he interacts with you, he may already be in a relationship whether he wants to be or not. Actually I mean whether he thinks or wants to be in a relationship or he thinks he doesn't want to be in a relationship. Does it feel like the flirting is casual and out of habit, or that there is some emotion behind it?
  #8  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 07:57 PM
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Miswimmy1 Miswimmy1 is offline
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I don't know. he just seems oblivious to the fact. he said he's never had a real relationship, but wants one. but then he said he doesn't want one with me. yet he continues to flirt. it doesn't make sense.
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  #9  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 07:59 PM
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Citrine Citrine is offline
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No its not appropriate to carry on flirting. Hes fine tuning his techniques for when he finds someone he actually wants to pursue? or is he secretly getting kicks from the flirting? At very least hes getting a boost from the reception he receives, to him its affirms he attractive in some way. Stop enabling him. Start talking to him about a new admirer/love interest even if you make one up and it should put him in his place. Boys or girls who cant get through their day without some kind of sexual attention need therapy IMO, they are a PITA for anyone else around but not the recipient.
  #10  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 08:12 PM
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unaluna unaluna is online now
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isn't high school the time to perfect your flirting skills? Unless he's saying something objectionable, why not just flirt back? Unless you really don't like him or don't want to be friends with him. Maybe he wants to get to know you better this way.
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  #11  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 08:13 PM
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Miswimmy1 Miswimmy1 is offline
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ya i guess so. I just feel like if he doesn't want something serious, why waste my time?
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  #12  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 08:30 PM
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yellowfrog268 yellowfrog268 is offline
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Yes, your right. I was not aware that you are a teenager.
  #13  
Old Jun 09, 2013, 08:51 PM
hamster-bamster hamster-bamster is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hankster View Post
isn't high school the time to perfect your flirting skills? Unless he's saying something objectionable, why not just flirt back? Unless you really don't like him or don't want to be friends with him. Maybe he wants to get to know you better this way.
Right.

Plus, Miswimmy1, if you flirt back in a playful way that does not obligate you to anything, you would be perfecting YOUR flirting skills, and that benefit to you would hopefully stop your resentment. Right now he gets to perfect his flirting skills and you get to hypothesize about the depths of his psyche - not fair. Flirt back and hypothesize about something more important in your free time.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Miswimmy1 View Post
ya i guess so. I just feel like if he doesn't want something serious, why waste my time?
If you do not like his flirting, do not talk to him, or, explain how you would or would not like to be talked to. If you do like it, flirt back. I agree that it is a little weird that he would not go out with you, but it is clearly not a deadly sin on his part. If you really cannot help
"wasting your time" because you do homework together or something like this, try to practice flirting to not feel that your time has been wasted completely.
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