[Daylightdancer]

My husband won't stop touching me, all the time he has to be touching my breasts, or my vagina. I don't know if this is normal, or if its because of my anxiety, but I just want to be able to sit with him and not have him grope or fondle me. I typically avoid any type of conflict, I don't know what to say to get him to stop, or if I should say anything at all...could this offend him?

[pinkbutterfly]

I know how that feels...and iI am sorry you're experiencing it. And NO it's not normal. You are not just an object to be touched and fondled for his pleasure. There is so much more to you, and should be to the relationship.

Honestly, it doesn't matter if it offends him...you need to feel safe and comfortable. You have the right to not be touched if you don't want to. Regardless of the fact that you are married to him, you can say no. You have the right to say no. It is YOUR body. Period.

If you feel uncomfortable with him constantly touching, you should speak up. Why would your husband get offended?

Yes, of course you should speak up! It's a bit much when you can't enjoy each other's company without a sexual content coming into it all of the time.

Are you newlyweds?

[Daylightdancer]

He could get offended because he says he touches me because he loves me...we have been married for almost two years

[healingme4me]

It's less concerning whether he'd be offended at being told to stop touching you constantly in a sexual nature, than the fact that you are expressing discomfort.

Boundaries!!

[yellowfrog268]

I'll understand if you don't want to respond to this but, is everything o.k. in the bedroom? I'm not at all implying that you should have to put up with being fondled if you don't want it, please do not interpret my comments that way. I'm asking because I've experienced something similar in past relationships and when I approached the subject, well, that was brought up. It was the individuals way (misguided though it was) of letting me know he wanted and needed more intimacy. He felt as though I wasn't getting the message so he figured a more direct approach might work.
Just a suggestion.

[miserableone]

I would agree with the others. no one should be made to be uncomfortable spouse or not. if his touching you all the time makes you that way then you need to bring it up and gently as possible. you should also have your needs met in the relationship and if that means just sitting with him and him not fondling you then that is your right as well.

[~Christina]

Being married does not mean the other person "owns" you and do whatever they want to. You need to let him know that this is a problem and it needs to be addressed.. So what if he gets offended.

Good Luck

[Harley47]

If something upsets you in a relationship, you should feel absolutely comfortable in expressing your displeasure, and he should respect you enough to stop, particularly if the source of displeasure is sexual in nature. You are not there to be fondled at his whim and fancy, and frankly, I find his behavior both unusual and highly disrespectful.

Speak to him about this, and explain that it makes you uncomfortable, and that you request he stop. Find out why he does this...lots of people are in love and don't operate under the same groping that you do, so I find his current reasoning to be flimsy at best. If he has the respect for you that a spouse should have, this should cease.

Please know you're in my thoughts and prayers, and I hope things work out for the best.

Hugs,
Harley