[yash256]

Hi, iam at a point in my life where i have lost everything i love and want. I was in a relationship for 6years. He was my first. I met him when i was 18 and i was so happy, we were going to get married, but he left me and is getting married next month. I feel so sad and so lonely. I usually spend the whole day in my bed crying. i just wish i could forget him but i keep thinking about him and this drives me crazy. I just want to die or get permanent memory loss so that i can forget all about him. This has even affected my perrformace at work. Please help me because I want to kill myself and end this pain.

[kaliope]

hi yash
losing someone we love can be traumatic but time will heal this wound. I know that doesn't help where you are at now. you just have to distract yourself with other things as time goes by the pain will lessen and you will find joy in your life again. as they say, when one door closes another one opens and you want to be ready when that other door opens. so if you don't have friends to talk to, find yourself a counselor to help you through your grief. until then, find things to distract you from your pain, a good book, funny movies, coloring, anything to get your mind off of him. hang in there. this will pass.

[Leed]

Dearheart, I know this hurts and hurts badly. But think about it -- you met him when you were 18. You were very young. You have MANY MANY years ahead of you! This guy is NOT worth your life! NO man is worth any woman's life! Don't every let any man carry that much worth to you! If you do, you will certainly be disappointed and hurt.

Naturally because he was your first, you'll always carry some piece of him in your heart, but don't close your heart to everyone else! You WILL find someone else to love -- and probably love even more than THIS one! Like I said, you were very young, and young love is immature love. When you've grown up, "adult love" goes deeper as it takes into account the commitment, the responsibilities, and all that goes with being a couple/getting married, etc.

If you're having too much trouble getting over this, talk with a therapist. He can help you get thru this, and deal with the pain. Perhaps even a grief counseling could help. You can contact one thru Hospice. They'll be happy to talk with you, as a breakup is much like a death, in that it's the death of a relationship. So give them a call. I wish you the very best. Please take care. Hugs, Lee

[Monica Bing]

I know things are really hard right now. But you DON'T deserve a guy who would leave you after 6 years and get married to someone else within the month.
You deserve much better than to be crying in bed all day. Please wake up to the reality that life is much much more than one relationship, no matter how much it may seem like it. There are plenty of other meaningful things in your life such as your work, family and friends. Most of all, there's YOU.
Please do take care of yourself. Don't take yourself too seriously. The world hasn't ended. Please feel free to talk to me whenever you feel alone and need support.

[tinyrabbit]

Please don't kill yourself. It gets better, even if it doesn't feel like it now. You CAN feel better and find someone better.

You need to allow yourself time to grieve - the end of a relationship is the death of hopes and dreams you had for yourself and that person. Allow yourself space and be aware but not judgmental of how you feel. Accept such emotions serve a purpose at least - they allow for healing etc Be mindful also that such extreme sensations cannot maintain themselves either - progression is inevitable even if it doesn't always seems apparent. Seek professional assistance if you feel it's necessary but i would encourage you to keep posting here too, i find it a great comfort at times. Good luck.