[foureleven]

In my last post on another forum, I kind of touched on this, but i am literally going crazy. I have been with my boyfriend officially for almost 6 months, but we were talking and "dating" i guess you could call it, for 4 months before that. He knew i had severe depression and would help me out with it all the time. I recently got diagnosed with bipolar, and he just doesn't believe me. He literally says "you do not have bipolar. stop saying that" which just confuses me. He has completely stopped trying to help me with any break downs i have, because he is getting fed up with my insecurity when he is around other girls, and i have this weird obsession with the thought that my boyfriend still thinks about his ex, which i don't even know if it's true or not. It's probably not, but i have no clue. i feel like he is getting fed up with me. And i can't just "try to talk to him
and explain all of my feelings" because i have done that before many times, and he doesn't really want to hear it, because i guess sometimes i get a little overdramatic, and i'll get too apologetic....too sappy trying to prove how much i love him/how much i care. what do i do? what can i say to him to get him to listen? i love him so much and i know that he loves me, i just don't know what to do!

[jadzea]

The reality is that you are bipolar. Your BF can deny it all he wants, that does not make him right. He may benefit from a session or two with a Pdoc to explain your illness, how it is diagnosed and what behavior to expect from you. If he cares about you he is probably scared and upset and knows no other way to express his feelings. It may be a difficult road for you and him as you adjust your life to this new illness but in the end I hope it is worth it.

[Splintercell]

Sorry to hear you are going through this difficult time. it seems to me that you know exactly what your doing wrong. If I may suggest that you try and focus your energy to help YOU cope better. Read and understand what you have because it appears that you are trying to look for help from your BF.(Comes across that you want him to fix you.)

Read about symptoms, treatment and get professional help to help you cope. I’m sure once you equip yourself with the knowledge you will be able to deal with insecurities and the difficulties your facing.

[hamster-bamster]

I think he does not need any sappiness coming from you. You are being sappy in an effort to show him how much you love him and how much you care. Change gears - show him how much you love him and how much you care by becoming responsible for the management of your illness and by learning to tolerate his interactions with other girls.

He needs to accept you for who you are and that includes your illness. As far as his interactions with other girls - the circumstances and frequency of such contact is something that you two need to negotiate so it is "OK" for your relationship.

Try not to obsess over what he may or may not be thinking about his ex, etc. You can't know for sure and none of us are "mind-readers."

I think that guys and girls have different modes of communication and levels of wanting to share. I think that you may be overwhelming him by sharing how distressing it is for you and you are overcompensating by possibly smothering him? Just a speculation on my part.

Do your best to have some more confidence in yourself. Take care of you. Trust him and negotiate his interactions with other girls if you haven't done so already. Give him some room to do as he pleases as long as it is within the boundaries of your relationship. Don't monitor him, so to speak, but over time you'll see if it is working. Actions speak louder than words.

Take care and I wish you the best. I have bipolar disorder, too, and it is very challenging but you are more than your illness. *hugs*