[morning8glory]

That is some thing to ponder chocolate sauce ,chicken and french fries in a bathroom.
The chocolate I can always go .
You must have a mini Kitchen ette in your bathroom.
You are funny thank you for insight in to your world.
I should of log on last night in the middle night when I was not sleeping . Your post would of gave me a laugh.
I struggle with trying to keep up some weekend and night time or early evening functions with my husband and we had one last night.
To do so I had to try to rest extra during the day yesterday so I could be with my husband last evening.
That is going against my natural needs to be some what active during the day.
I am not a night person.
It is part of my life with him to try to go places with him that we have always went.
So I start out yesterday with no tea to perk me up so I can nap good during the day. I felt slightly depressed all day yesterday with out the tea to perk up me because so much needs to be done in my world here at home and so much I want to do in my yard and flowers and I am trying to rest most of day so I can be with my wonderful husband in the evening.
I then drink tea to perk my self up before the function early evening and at the function I am very tired any way as usual and my chemical allergys are kicking in so I was really start to strugging badly.
I left for a bit to find cough drops at a store.
But I coughed and blew my nose through the program any way and my eyes watered and I was just miserable. At one point I felt like crying.
The balance of being happy staying home most of the time and being out with my husband is very hard to find.
Many people in our life do not understand my limitations. Last night some one suggested we should of sat in a different area we sat in very front seats because of my allergy to people.
Another person came to speak to me the person thought I was up set about some thing so the tears that come with being extremely tired and chemical allergys ,peoples purfumes we did have to change seats after we got seated once for fear of the purfume behind us.
I tried to tell the person I was not in a good mood hoping they would leave me alone and the person sat down next to me instead and became very tiresome to be with.
Since I was forced to engage in polite conversation any way.
I know the person suffers deep depression so I was trying to be considerate of her feelings being kind.
I even was forced to make a joke about my self.
Both these people who think they can make a difference in my life just recently both of those women have been seperated from husbands and they think they can solve my problems.
These problems are worse for me at night. I have no other night life besides the things we have always done regulary as a couple.
Then after function I could not sleep most of the night I am up and down. I got up and took a bath went back to bed.
Today the depression tried hard to again creep in .
I am very behind in my house work.
I am tired all day and in bed most of day.
I ignore all house work. Started laundry but it sits in the washing machine wet as I type this.
We have another important function Friday night.
I want to go. I want to be there.
There is no place I would rather be than with my husband by his side.
But it is so hard with my chronic health problems.
Other people make it hard with there actions and comments to me. No one offers real help just too many ideas and words. Come to my door with a mop and bucket and pull up your sleeves and keep all the extra words to your self that how I feel.
Even before I married my husband I joined him in every thing we did besides his job.
I knew our married life would enclude many extra activitys with other people several times a week.
I am mostly very good around people when not feeling sick.
My husband was not he was shy.
He tells people what stuck out in his mind when he met me was all the people who gathered around me and the fun they were having.
Chronic illness has changed that.
He is great about my chronic problems he knows my struggle he made me eggs for supper tonight and did the dishes.
I find the struggle depresses me.
I want to live a more simple life away from people but it is not hardly possible.
Much is expected of me because of the position my husband holds.
Morning8Glory