[moodybaby13]

To sum it up...I have been married 3 times, I have 3 kids and one grandchild. I am only 40 years old. I am tired. But not physically. I have a great career and until recently had a husband (3rd one) that actually loved me. I have been there and done that. Therapy, medication. Both outpatient and inpatient therapy. I have no friends, my kids do not like me and my husband has recently told me if I left it would not matter. You would have to say to yourself that I would have to be a terrible person yet I am not. I always gave my kids what they wanted as well as my husband. I have always been passive aggressive because I never wanted the people in my life to be unhappy yet now I am at the point that I am truly sad. I am lost, tired, and feel as though I have nothing left because there is nothing left fore me. Everything in my life so far as proven that. Need feedback.....thanks

[online user]

Sorry you are feeling so low. Usually a therapist is a good resource for someone feeling as you do--to help you see the potential or sort out what might improve your situation. Is there some reason you don't think therapy could be part of a resolution of your issues?

Exercise is usually theraputic too. Can you work in a daily walk?

[DePressMe]

Moodybaby, I have had a hard time asserting myself for who I am because I did not want others to be unhappy and this has lead to some passive-aggressive behaviors. I only have 2 close people left in my life because I lost everybody else due to this pattern.

The 2 people I have left are here because they unconditionally love me (amazing since I have hidden parts of myself) and because I have made a concentrated effort to be myself and take into account their needs/desires because I love them not just because I am scared of a state of unhappiness. Besides how can a person truly love me if I am hiding parts of myself through manipulative behavior?

I have come to realize that my intentions for making people happy are as important as the actual act that makes them happy. When I'm being passive aggressive I am not being honest and others pick-up on my insincerity.

I still struggle with this issue. I often feel sad about the loss of the people I have loved and ashamed of how I hurt them. When I slip back into my passive aggressive pattern of people pleasing with those motives, I feel disconnected from my 2 remaining friends and I feel totally alone. I fight the feeling of being unloved since I feel like people don't really know me. Then I feel resentful towards myself for causing it in the first place.

I don't know if you can relate to any of this because I don't know a whole lot about your situation. This is just my experience that came to mind when I read your post. Please don't give up. Everybody is a unique soul who deserves to give and receive love. Take care of yourself.........D.

[Fuzzybear]

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[Colorsoftherainbow]

I've just recently lost everything too. I have never let anyone see the real me. I have always wanted to please people, even if it ment putting my feeling aside. I have (dont know for how much longer) a great job. But I cant take the stress of it anymore. When I started telling my husband of 22 years that I couldnt take it. he didnt care. It's been six weeks, I cant face anyone. I know I have some real problems that I need to face. I'm seeing a counselor. But I'm so lost. I feel like my life is over. I scared to death. The counselor said that I emotionally manipulated my husband. I went straight home and told my husband what the counselor had said and told him how sorry I was. He doesnt care anymore. Its too late. I'm lost and scared. Somehow some way, I know I will learn from this and come out to be a better person. I wish you the best, and if you have any solutions please let me know. I have a lot of problems because of my childhood, I thought that I had dealt with them and was okay. I guess not. I didnt deal with them, I hide them.

[FlowerBlast123]

If you say you have nothing left, try to make something for yourself. Are there activities that you enjoy? You said you focused on everyone else. Try to focus on yourself, what makes you happy or at least what makes you crack a smile. Volunteer at an animal shelter if you like animals, animals can also be very therapeutic. Try exercising or joining an exercise group, the movement should make you feel a little better too.

[Carmelbythesea]

Do you know the reason all three of your kids dislike you?

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