[minkimac]

Got married this year march. From December last year my mom in law has been coming to stay with us. She was even there when we got back from honeymoon. Then she left for about a month, then my husbands brother came to live with us. Circumstances changed so he left and she is back staying with us. We have probably had about 2 months the whole year to ourselves. Its not that she is homeless she has a place where she lives she but the rest of my husbands family think its fine to do this. I have been very accommodating and welcoming but now im feeling overcrowded and want space. I told my husband this and he says he didn't grow up to kick his mother out its cruel and he wasn't brought up like that. However the deal was not for her to live with us and so she is just staying with us for an unlimited period. I understand that they were brought up always having people over but I have accommodated it and now there has to be a limit. Its taking a toll because we have no privacy she is at home everyday, my husband doesn't take me out without bringing her with. I have told him all this but he doesn't have the heart to tell her to leave and says if I tell her then she will run to the family and cry. I really feel he has chosen his family over me and I dont know how to deal with it.

[curley]

Wow Mink, I am kinda lost on this one. If your Mother in law has a place to live why in the heck is she with you and your hubby. How does he figure he is kicking her out if he explains you would both like a little alone time? Why doesnt he think it is strange that she has her own place but insists on living with you?
Maybe you should ask some of your family to come and visit and see if it is ok with him!
Maybe you should feel realllllllllly lucky she did not come along on the honeymoon.
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!

[Bugeaud]

Well, I can sort of sympathize with your husband. Not to say that your problem isn't valid, as it very well is. But for me, I come from a poor family, and sometimes a family member has no where else to go. So you have to take them in. That's just how it is, and I get used to it. But yeah, if she seriously has a house of her own, that isn't like a death shack, than there's no real excuses...

[minkimac]

Thanks curley and bugeaud my mom has actually stayed with us and he couldn't handle it so he knows. Also I suggested we go to our church for advice he said no because he knows they would also say its not right. And by all means if she had nowhere to go I would be ok with it. But she does live with his other brother and she chooses just to stay here. I dont know how to continue handling this except to maybe go stay with a friend if she doesn't leave. I do believe I have been fair and feel I am more important. Thanks guys.