[Luvhurtz]

My girlfriend and I have been together for roughly five months. I am madly in love with her. She had a hysterectomy in August. Since then, she appears to be going through a deep depression. Our communication has worsened, and she has lost all interest in any intimate activities. She doesn't want to be touched. It all boiled over a few weeks ago when she said she needed space. She insists it is not me and that she doesn't want to be around anyone, not even her family. I am trying to ride this out but it is frustrating as hell. For one, I am not sure how this "space" works. She still texts me and calls me, and apparently expects me to call her. She apparently just started seeing a therapist a few days ago so I am hoping these issues will resolve. But I am not certain. I am asking for help. Anyone been through anything similar? How long should I give her space? Am I wasting my time? I am starting to feel depressed behind this whole thing. Thank you.

[Grey Matter]

You're not wasting your time. I was diagnosed with MDD (major depressive disorder) when I was a teen, and I have been in a few relationships. I am in one now.

Depression is, in it's self, this black hole. You want to communicate with those you love, yet you feel unable or unworthy. You want to be affectionate, yet there feels like there is a wall blocking you and you do not have the strength to move it. It is fantastic that she is seeing a therapist, so she knows she can get the help she needs and begin feeling better. That is a good sign.

You said she had a hysterectomy. We live in a society that teaches girls that they are feminine if they have certain parts, can produce children, etc. She is also going through massive hormone changes which is expected after such a surgery, which can be contributing to her mood. All of these things can pile up on each other and cause insane amounts of stress. But what is great is that she has reached out for help. That takes a lot of guts.

Take care of yourself as well, but realize what she has gone through isn't minor.

[KathrynEWyant]

I think you are wasting your time, because she wants to breakup with you now thats why she make this type of situation toward you. and make you to leave her.

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by Luvhurtz

My girlfriend and I have been together for roughly five months. I am madly in love with her. She had a hysterectomy in August. Since then, she appears to be going through a deep depression. Our communication has worsened, and she has lost all interest in any intimate activities. She doesn't want to be touched. It all boiled over a few weeks ago when she said she needed space. She insists it is not me and that she doesn't want to be around anyone, not even her family. I am trying to ride this out but it is frustrating as hell. For one, I am not sure how this "space" works. She still texts me and calls me, and apparently expects me to call her. She apparently just started seeing a therapist a few days ago so I am hoping these issues will resolve. But I am not certain. I am asking for help. Anyone been through anything similar? How long should I give her space? Am I wasting my time? I am starting to feel depressed behind this whole thing. Thank you.

If she just had a hyst, then that is certainly one thing, in a womans' life that can lead to depression. It's good that she has begun therapy. Is she also involved with the hystersister community, for support?

I don't feel, you are wasting your time.