Hii everyone! . Okay so I hang out with a group of people, and one of these people I feel like is a fake friend even though she says she likes me as a friend. I think actions speak louder than words. When she is by herself with me, she will talk to me, but around others, it is like I don't exist. And she also complains how much she hates it when people do that to her. She also constantly asks me for money and even asks me to have some of my food, once she took half of it without permission although lately I kept her from doing that and no longer lend her money or food. I feel like I'm more of a back up friend or someone she just befriended out of pity. She befriended a couple other people out of pity since even though she can't stand them, she doesn't want confrontation or want to hurt feelings so she pretends to like them. I confronted her several times about it and even talked to a couple other people about it and they all say that there is nothing wrong and that she is a true friend and that it is probably just because of her ADHD, but I'm still not feeling right. Not sure if I am overreacting or not.

[Macrick]

Originally Posted by 15LRC

Hii everyone! . Okay so I hang out with a group of people, and one of these people I feel like is a fake friend even though she says she likes me as a friend. I think actions speak louder than words. When she is by herself with me, she will talk to me, but around others, it is like I don't exist. And she also complains how much she hates it when people do that to her. She also constantly asks me for money and even asks me to have some of my food, once she took half of it without permission although lately I kept her from doing that and no longer lend her money or food. I feel like I'm more of a back up friend or someone she just befriended out of pity. She befriended a couple other people out of pity since even though she can't stand them, she doesn't want confrontation or want to hurt feelings so she pretends to like them. I confronted her several times about it and even talked to a couple other people about it and they all say that there is nothing wrong and that she is a true friend and that it is probably just because of her ADHD, but I'm still not feeling right. Not sure if I am overreacting or not.

Based on what you stated, I strongly suggest that you distance yourself slowly from this person. Alot of people are like that these days worldwide, it's not a cultural or nationality. It's just how things are these days.
You be nice to them, they ****ing take advantage of you. REMEMBER, stay away from such people. Be safe & prosper.

[curley]

Hi 15. I don't see any reason to befriend anyone that I do not like. Granted in social situations it may be necessary to be nice to people you really don't care for, but friends NO.
I learned a long time ago that is someone is always asking me for something and showing me that they are not my friend it is best to move along. Like you said, Actions speak louder then words.

[AngstyLady]

I agree with Macrick and Curley- this girl is not too be trusted- she reminds me of a former 'friend' of mine- was a real user and manipulator- long story short- it didn't end well- don't get too close and trust your instincts.

[CrimsonBlues]

Hello 15LRC-

I think you are right-actions speak louder than words. And, to me, it is a red flag when people act differently when they are alone with me and when they are around others. I wonder who they really are-which one is the real version? You wrote that some people said they didn't see a problem with the person but it may be that you are just more aware of things, more attuned to the way people respond and the way they act. I strongly believe in paying attention to your inner instincts-those instincts are there to protect you. I agree with the other people on this thread-back away from this person. A true friendship should be give and take and it sounds like you are doing all the giving. I would follow your instincts. I wish you well.

Originally Posted by Macrick

Based on what you stated, I strongly suggest that you distance yourself slowly from this person. Alot of people are like that these days worldwide, it's not a cultural or nationality. It's just how things are these days.
You be nice to them, they ****ing take advantage of you. REMEMBER, stay away from such people. Be safe & prosper.

Exactly, totally agree with you. Thanks.

Originally Posted by AngstyLady

I agree with Macrick and Curley- this girl is not too be trusted- she reminds me of a former 'friend' of mine- was a real user and manipulator- long story short- it didn't end well- don't get too close and trust your instincts.

Yeah, exactly. I am starting to distance myself to her a bit.

Originally Posted by CrimsonBlues

Hello 15LRC-

I think you are right-actions speak louder than words. And, to me, it is a red flag when people act differently when they are alone with me and when they are around others. I wonder who they really are-which one is the real version? You wrote that some people said they didn't see a problem with the person but it may be that you are just more aware of things, more attuned to the way people respond and the way they act. I strongly believe in paying attention to your inner instincts-those instincts are there to protect you. I agree with the other people on this thread-back away from this person. A true friendship should be give and take and it sounds like you are doing all the giving. I would follow your instincts. I wish you well.

Yep, totally agree. And even though she has ADHD, she really only gets real hyper when she is around a certain group of people, so I think it is more of her just being inconsiderate. I agree, I think the other two friends are being blinded since the other two are dating so they are always focused on each other so they probably don't realize it. And yes, I tend to notice more when something is wrong. She does very little giving, very little. And she tends to annoy people a lot, even the other two friends seem to get annoyed at times by her hyper ness. And if I am upset, the other two people are the ones who notice and ask if I am okay. The one girl doesn't, and she avoids any possibility of talking about a problem if she thinks someone is mad at her, like, she'll try to find her way out of it so she won't have to talk to that person.

[healingme4me]

I think the moment she tried grabbing my food away from me, is the point I'd either swatted her hand away from me, made some comment about back off, away from my food, or I'd stop associating.

Sounds rude, and inconsiderate.

Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2

Originally Posted by healingme4me

I think the moment she tried grabbing my food away from me, is the point I'd either swatted her hand away from me, made some comment about back off, away from my food, or I'd stop associating.

Sounds rude, and inconsiderate.

Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2

Exactly, usually she asks but she asks too much, but that one time she just grabbed food and I felt like I had to let her have some but feel really stupid for letting her do it. I no longer let her and she almost did it again but I stopped her. I think she thinks of me as a back up friend and someone she can use. Unless she changes, I think I will stop associating with her.