Hi There ,
This is my first time posting here so i am a little nervous,but i need help

Over the last few months i have been chatting to this guy on FB ,we met 3 months ago and just recently we had a one night stand via phone(don't know if that counts as a one night stand or not .......)

Now,since it has happened i have regretted making such a huge mistake.I feel like such a an idiot and like a cheap class hooker for going this far with him ...Its not something i usually do

He hasn't really spoken to me since it happened which makes it even worse,and leads me to believe he was only interested in me for one thing all along....

I am mostly angry at myself for being so naieve and careless about the whole situation and have been feeling depressed ever since

What should i do???? please help

[shezbut]

Well, how long has it been since you've talked with the guy? Have you ever physically met with him, or was it entirely a computer relationship?

Have you tried contacting him via phone or through an eye-catching post upon his home page?

I really can't advise you on what you should do, I can only give you my opinion. My opinion is that computer intimate relationships should be avoided. Same thing with strictly telephone relationships. There are a lot of non-verbal cues that we are completely unaware of on the computer or phone. The person that we're talking with just may be a complete creep, but has a way with words...how would we know? That's a big concern of mine, personally.

I therefore have a difficult time understanding the issue. I would advise you to chalk this experience up to learning, and aim for more solid relationships in the future. I'm also not a FB user. If you are a big FB user, then maybe some changes can be made to your page to prevent anymore incidents from popping up & hurting you.

Change your address? Keep more strict control over who's allowed to enter your page? Limit your chat to sites where you know everyone personally.

Go out into your community to work upon developing friendships and romance. Maybe ask comfortable people at your job if they'd like to be your friend and do something together. Like: go to a coffee club, a bookstore, or something along those lines. It is challenge. It certainly is for me, anyway! But, you're merely asking like-minded people to go hang out some time. Right?

Anyway, that is my opinion. I hope that it helps you in some way. Btw, welcome to Psych Central! Take care.

[likewater]

Why do you think you are stupid? Therare very charming/manipulative people out thers. You were trusting. There are very intelligent smart women and men fooled who lose
their lifesavings to conartists online. I'm sorry a jerk took advantage of your good natire. May angels surround you.

[healingme4me]

What happened, doesn't make you an idiot or cheap class hooker. Makes you human.

Some people in this world, are love 'em and leave 'em types.

Could see, the positive in all of this. You got the chance to discover this about him, without pregnancy scare or disease worries.

I'm not making light, its just something to consider about how to avoid this trap with other men, in the future.
Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2

[CrimsonBlues]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

What happened, doesn't make you an idiot or cheap class hooker. Makes you human.

Some people in this world, are love 'em and leave 'em types.

Could see, the positive in all of this. You got the chance to discover this about him, without pregnancy scare or disease worries.

I'm not making light, its just something to consider about how to avoid this trap with other men, in the future.
Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2

Hi sarahlou83-

I agree with those who have posted and with healingme4me-you are not an idiot, you are human. I don't think there is a person out there who doesn't have a story of a situation that didn't go well, where we wouldn't repeat it if given the chance to do it over-but that is how we grow and learn. Unfortunately, there are people out there who seem to mostly be interested in the physical/sexual aspects of a relationship-that can and does happen whether you meet someone online or in person. But there are advantages to meeting people in person, that is, if they are not being truthful there are more opportunities to spot that. I myself have learned (and continue to learn) the hard way that people online are not always what or who they say they are. It seems to me that you were interested in finding someone to be in an intimate relationship with and found a person who was selfish and treated you with disrespect. That is an unfortunate risk that we all take when attempting to find people to be in a relationship with. I can only recommend that you be compassionate toward yourself and try to always be true to yourself and what you feel is right for you in relationships. Take things at a pace that works for you and where you feel that they have earned your trust before going to a more intimate phase.

[niceguy]

everyone can be a jerk. The question was did you enjoy it (you know before he bailed)....

Also, don't forget you don't have to see them again- so plus side, wiser for next time, right!