[PeaceKeeper93]

Sorry I messed up on the title on the other post, you can comment on it still, but the title is just messed up, lol. I am just curious about this. It's weird cause my guy friend he'll say sexual things to me here and there, but I just usually laugh and he gets quiet. Then one time I went out with a guy and I heard behind my back that he said to another guy friend of mine "She's way too good for him, man!" He even said to me "I'm a piece of ****" "I'm a douchebag" etc. He never actually said to me "You're too good for me" But I get the feeling he feels that way. I remember he said "You're way too nice" he said that in regards to a guy that ditched me, and stood me up, and I just let it go, and never talked to that guy again.

I remember one time he was drunk and he kept going on and on about a guy I dated ONCE and he kept bashing him, and he kept on mocking him in a way. I notice that he seems more comfortable around people that are kinda trashy and he seems more quiet and reserved around me. I always hear compliments behind my back, like he'll barely compliment me to my face.

Anyways back to the question. When a guy feels that the girl is "too good" for him will he distance himself? Will he feel intimidated? I am just curious if this is a insecurity problem. Like what makes a guy think you are "too good" for them? Thanks

[Fluttrbye]

Either 1) he doesn't have a very good opinion of himself and has little or no self-esteem, or
2) he admires your character and confidence.

What seems odd is that he doesn't compliment to your face but behind your back.
That behavior is not what a true friend is.

[PeaceKeeper93]

Originally Posted by Fluttrbye

Either 1) he doesn't have a very good opinion of himself and has little or no self-esteem, or
2) he admires your character and confidence.

What seems odd is that he doesn't compliment to your face but behind your back.
That behavior is not what a true friend is.

Thanks! But what do you mean by "That behavior is not what a true friend is."? I am not being provocative about it, I am just curious, cause honestly I think he's just shy, and he seems to have insecurity issues, but I could be wrong. But thank you!!! ))

Originally Posted by PeaceKeeper93

Sorry I messed up on the title on the other post, you can comment on it still, but the title is just messed up, lol. I am just curious about this. It's weird cause my guy friend he'll say sexual things to me here and there, but I just usually laugh and he gets quiet. Then one time I went out with a guy and I heard behind my back that he said to another guy friend of mine "She's way too good for him, man!" He even said to me "I'm a piece of ****" "I'm a douchebag" etc. He never actually said to me "You're too good for me" But I get the feeling he feels that way. I remember he said "You're way too nice" he said that in regards to a guy that ditched me, and stood me up, and I just let it go, and never talked to that guy again.

I remember one time he was drunk and he kept going on and on about a guy I dated ONCE and he kept bashing him, and he kept on mocking him in a way. I notice that he seems more comfortable around people that are kinda trashy and he seems more quiet and reserved around me. I always hear compliments behind my back, like he'll barely compliment me to my face.

Anyways back to the question. When a guy feels that the girl is "too good" for him will he distance himself? Will he feel intimidated? I am just curious if this is a insecurity problem. Like what makes a guy think you are "too good" for them? Thanks

He probably feels that way about you and likes you, but since he doesn't feel "worthy" he won't do anything to approach you until you open the door for him. You would, if you wanted to, have to be the one to let him know you're interested. It's kind of his indirect way of saying "I want you but I don't know if you would go for a guy like me"

[PeaceKeeper93]

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

He probably feels that way about you and likes you, but since he doesn't feel "worthy" he won't do anything to approach you until you open the door for him. You would, if you wanted to, have to be the one to let him know you're interested. It's kind of his indirect way of saying "I want you but I don't know if you would go for a guy like me"

Thanks! That makes a lot of sense! But it's weird cause he is so extroverted and outgoing with other people, but yet to me he is more shy. I mean he'll say sexual comments here and there, and like I said he'll compliment me behind my back, and very subtly he'll compliment me to my face. But he has no problem saying "I love you" to me. So I don't get it? lol! He says "I love you" to me a lot, and he almost makes a point of saying that everytime we see each other or talk to each other. But thank you!! I appreciate your opinion!

[Webgoji]

1. I would say he thinks the world of you and nobody will be able to live up to you in his eyes. He doesn't think there's anyone who is nice enough or kind enough to treat you the way you should be treated.

Originally Posted by PeaceKeeper93

It's weird cause my guy friend he'll say sexual things to me here and there, but I just usually laugh and he gets quiet.

2. This is your dead give-away here. He's feeling awkward and doesn't know what to say so he throws out something. Because he's feeling "inferior", it comes out as something he probably shouldn't say. Then you laugh and that cements it in his mind that you aren't interested. (What he's saying probably isn't appropriate, but he's uncomfortable so he says something he shouldn't.) The reason he doesn't compliment you to your face is because he's afraid you'll laugh at that as well.

Originally Posted by PeaceKeeper93

Thanks! That makes a lot of sense! But it's weird cause he is so extroverted and outgoing with other people, but yet to me he is more shy. I mean he'll say sexual comments here and there, and like I said he'll compliment me behind my back, and very subtly he'll compliment me to my face. But he has no problem saying "I love you" to me. So I don't get it? lol! He says "I love you" to me a lot, and he almost makes a point of saying that everytime we see each other or talk to each other. But thank you!! I appreciate your opinion!

Depending on the other personality people do behave differently. Apparently something about your personality is making him more shy. Perhaps he is extroverted, except when he actually has feelings for someone? That could be it right there. In any case if you're interested in him, I hope it works out for you!

[happiedasiy]

Dear PeaceKeeper93,

It sounds like he is behaving as people who do lack the confidence to show true colors.
Maybe you can help him by opening the door (figuratively).
Compliment him about the things you like about him.

When a guy really likes a special woman ( shes the one for me ) they get weird/ not being able to express to you but can say to others. How do you feel about him?

Sounds like he does have some insecurity issues or maybe he is warning you, he may be afraid of a good relationship with a great girl.
The ball is in your hand.

[PeaceKeeper93]

Originally Posted by Webgoji

1. I would say he thinks the world of you and nobody will be able to live up to you in his eyes. He doesn't think there's anyone who is nice enough or kind enough to treat you the way you should be treated.


2. This is your dead give-away here. He's feeling awkward and doesn't know what to say so he throws out something. Because he's feeling "inferior", it comes out as something he probably shouldn't say. Then you laugh and that cements it in his mind that you aren't interested. (What he's saying probably isn't appropriate, but he's uncomfortable so he says something he shouldn't.) The reason he doesn't compliment you to your face is because he's afraid you'll laugh at that as well.

Oh! I see! That makes sense! Yeah, he says things that are inappropriate and it's just awkward for me, so I just laugh, cause I don't know what else to do, haha. Like I am not the flirty type. I am very shy, and even though I can joke around and be nice, but I am also shy. Like he is very outgoing, and very extroverted, and he is very funny too! So I was really drawn to his personality, and how outgoing he was. Like when I would go to my friends bonfires and he was there, he would ignore me, but he would kinda talk to me, but at first I was thinking it was because he didn't like me, but maybe cause he is weirdly shy around me. I don't know. He's more quiet around me and listens, where as with other people he's loud and cracking jokes, and I honestly thought it was because he was insecure, or didn't like me. Thank you! I appreciate your opinion!

[PeaceKeeper93]

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

Depending on the other personality people do behave differently. Apparently something about your personality is making him more shy. Perhaps he is extroverted, except when he actually has feelings for someone? That could be it right there. In any case if you're interested in him, I hope it works out for you!

Thank you! I am interested in him, but I guess because i'm shy I am afraid to take initiative cause I have done that a couple of times when I was younger and I just ended up getting rejected, and it hurt me, cause I myself have low self esteem, so to actually gain the courage to tell someone you like them and then have them reject you and your feelings, that just furthermore my self esteem issues, and rejection issues. However, he does say "I love you" a lot to me, and he said he likes me, but I guess I don't believe him? lol! I know i'm so insecure myself. It's ridiculous. But I am the quiet, shy type. I am not flirty at all. I can joke around and have fun and be goofy, but only with people I am comfortable with. When I started to get comfortable with him I would joke around with him a lot, and he wouldn't joke back with me. Which I thought was odd, cause he's the funny guy! He's the type that jokes around and pranks etc. He is the goofy type, lol. Everytime though I am on his level he doesn't joke back. It's just weird how he is different around me, cause with other people he jokes around with them a lot, but with me he acts more shy and introverted with other people he's loud and acts like the "life of the party" Thank you! and sorry for the long response, haha.

[PeaceKeeper93]

Originally Posted by happiedasiy

Dear PeaceKeeper93,

It sounds like he is behaving as people who do lack the confidence to show true colors.
Maybe you can help him by opening the door (figuratively).
Compliment him about the things you like about him.

When a guy really likes a special woman ( shes the one for me ) they get weird/ not being able to express to you but can say to others. How do you feel about him?

Sounds like he does have some insecurity issues or maybe he is warning you, he may be afraid of a good relationship with a great girl.
The ball is in your hand.

That could very well be true! It just weird cause he'll express his problems to me, and he'll express little things here and there. Like very subtly he makes comments to me. It's just not all the time. He makes it seem like he's not interested in me, but then I will hear from friends that he said he likes me and he said this and that about me. Like my one friend said that he said "She's a good girl" and my friend said he like smiled as he said it, haha. He also "joked on a square" to our friends, saying we were dating, when we clearly weren't. He quickly said he was "just joking" so that was let go. But he stares at me all the time. It's like he's looking through me, lol. Cause he like deeply stares. But it's hard cause I am shy myself, and I have insecurities, trust issues, and self esteem issues myself, so it's hard for me to take the initiative, but thank you so much for commenting!

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by happiedasiy

The ball is in your hand.

I believe the actual quote is "the ball is in your court" but i think happydaisy is really right here - this guys private parts are in your hands! Be gentle with him, but if i were you i would let him know i was interested.

[happiedasiy]

Originally Posted by hankster

I believe the actual quote is "the ball is in your court" but i think happydaisy is really right here - this guys private parts are in your hands! Be gentle with him, but if i were you i would let him know i was interested.

Dear Hankster,
OHno I did not mean what I said, the ball is in her court is correct.
Thank you!
I hope however thing evolve you are happy.
PS EVERYONE comes with their own insecurities, no one is perfect.
You obliviously have a good friendship together, which is a good foundation to start a girl/boyfriend.
I agree with hanksters advice.

One last thing, those other girls you talked about may get jealous.
Never-mind them.
If you need more advice, we are here!