[Nicks_Nose]

I recently read about the gender preferences and identities that different people relate to and one question kept screaming in my head.

"What if I have no desire for anybody?"

I used to be attracted to men. Dabbled with the idea of both men and women, but now I have no desire for physical intimacy with anybody. I don't feel like I am missing anything either. I just have no desire for the act.

I desire for intellectual connection with a person. I desire a sense of a soul connection. However, sex doesn't enter my thoughts or wants.

[gayleggg]

Have you spoke to a doctor about this? It may be a hormone imbalance. It might be worth checking into. Of course, if you are happy with the way things are I wouldn't worry about it.

Well, as for me, I'm getting old now. And, between that & the depression & anxiety, Gender Identity Dysphoria, medications, & some surgery I had a few years back, I no longer have any sexual desire... and I'm SO glad it's gone! It's the one big PLUS I've gained during this whole mental illness experience!

If you have no problem with it, why worry? There are plenty of Asexual people out there that don't really have any desire for sex. Thing is, who cares what the average person is like if you're happy with how you are? The only issue is finding a partner that has teh same desires as you and will be ok with lack of sex. But I'm sure there are those out there that will be perfectly find with it.

[atomicc]

If you are happy to be this way then no need to fret. Perhaps look into Asexuality? I watched a documentary a little while back and it seemed like they have a very supportive community.

[yumi]

I have no desire , either.
Every single man in my life ended up making me feel like I wasn't good enough just the way I was. Being pushed into porn viewing, being asked to do threesomes, this or that....they all ended up cheating anyway, taking the easy way out and not simply appreciating me for the way I was. Each time I would get naked with these men and get their words bombarding into my mind, how about you do this? How about you do that? They had no idea that each and everytime they did this they further eroded my self-esteem. Reinforcing in my brain that I just didn't measure up. It was always about their pricks they were worried about, never considering the fragility of my mind. I think being naked in front of your husband is the most vulnerable position a person can be in.....add their constant bombardments to the mix ....it does something deep in the soul.

I've suspected myself to be bisexual, however, I made the choice to choose only men. I did not want to cross that boundary I made for myself, because I do fundamentally feel men and Women are the right choice, however, I do support the gay choice and the gay community.

Although I could be bisexual in nature, I could never bring myself to act on it, because there was always something I could not place my finger on. I think deep down, I know it just would not have been the right fit for me.

So, with men always thinking with their pricks and my feeling that women really would not be a good fit for me, I finally gave up. Men hurt me too much, no matter how much I wanted things to work out with them. I resigned myself to the knowledge that intimacy just will never work for me anymore. The eroded self-esteem coupled with major depression finally did me in.

I am like you and yearn for intellectual connections and soul connections, but I have not found someone at all in my life to where we would be a perfect compatible match. People generally want things from me. I just want simplicity ....nobody taking from each other, but enriching each other at the same time...with no hidden ajendas, no deceipt, .....just honest connection. Im not sure if that even exists in the reality of this world. It sure is lonely, but its better than becoming more eroded than I already am.

[Nicks_Nose]

It seems so un-natural I guess, since sexuality is advertised in everything from toothpaste to plumbing products. Thanks to all who responded so supportive. I didn't realize there were others like me.

Big sigh of relief.