Inappropiate Dancing?

Im male, and im a very uncomfortable dancer. I feel nervous and rigid if im dancing on my own. I cant just get into it without feeling self concious, that people would be watching me, that id do it wrong or w/e.
But if I have a girl to dance with i feel instantly relaxed. Im sure im still ****, but its fine, i can enjoy it then.
However im concerned that maybe my intimacy is inapropiate. Seeing as i dont know how to dance, i cant really tell what is an inappropiate way to dance with another girl, as i have a girlfriend.

So recently I was at a friends birthday, and we went to play that involved dancing. Unsuprisingly i didnt really dance. i tried my best to bop or seem enthsiastic but it didnt really work. My friend, who include my sister and her bf called me over one or twice to dance with them, as i stopped just short of the circle they formed upon entering the dance hall. So i tried once, maye a second time, the third time i refused and left myself to my statuesque fate.

However later one of the friends of the birthday girl beckoned me to dance , i got to say that im not much of a dancer, that i dont normally dance etc, which perhaps soothed me to lower her expectations right off the bat,
but eh.. once i drew closer and crouched down a little bit (loosten my knees i mean) i felt instantly relaxed and it was cool.
But then i thought how does this look. Im not trying to ****** this girl i just want to dance for fun like a normal person. And i think i was pretty close to her. i mean we wernt grinding of ech other, but it was intimate like. Or i tthink so anyway. So i looked around and saw my sis and her bf were looking at me, im not sure what the liook was saying, weather it was 'oh look he's finally dancing', or 'thats how he dances'. but it was enough to make me back away. Unfortunaely my solo dancing then rapidly deteriorated again.

So its an embarasing question to ask abouot a topic which i am embaressed to do.. But is my dancing too sexual..
Whats an okay way to dance with someone?

Hi, RobG, and welcome to Psych Central! Actually I've never been very comfortable with dancing either.

It depends on the kind of music and who you are with, I'd say. How about looking around to see how other folks are dancing?

Let's see what other folks say.

Its really hard to tell without seeing it but there are 2 questions you should ask yourself:

1) was she offended?
2) Were there any children present and were your movements too sexual for them? (If first part is no then disregard 2nd part)

Dancing is subjective and it is hard to dance with someone and not have it be an intimate encounter. Personally I think that if there is no touching then it can't be inappropriate (outside of obviously offensive gestures). Add to that it is easier to not look awkward when your dancing with someone else as opposed to solo so you need to get close and kinda match their movement and it can sometimes look sexual. If it is done in an adult environment then the only opinions that should matter are those of your partner and yourself.

On a side note, don't worry about the bad dancing. I too am afflicted with this and I fully believe that except for a chosen few men can not look good dancing as we really do not have the grace and beauty of our better halves.

Ok, thanks. I think i must have been okay then and just psyched myself out. I pass that checklist

Perfect, and accurate. Well, all but the last 'side note'...lol I bet you look just fine dancing. Men are too tough on themselves!

I would only add, that slow dancing (which I think is what the OP was asking about) is supposed to involve close touching (unless it's ballroom in which case it's a totally different...er...ballgame) and is usually done by men and women as a way to avoid looking awkward by dancing at all. I used to ONLY slow dance because it was easy just to let the man lead me around the room or just shuffle in place. Once I got confident enough to fast dance--different topic--I changed up a few things but I still slow dance the same..let the partner take the lead and just stay close

If your dance partner didnt complain and no one pulled you to side afters wards to say any thing negative to you about your dance style then I would say it was all fine in this day and age with the younger crowd, therefore, you just psyched your self out of a night full of fun with the fair ladies.

if i have a girlfriend, i don't dance with other women..maybe i am old fashioned, but to me it is a matter of respect.

if i am single..i do what i will without guilt, the fact that you are uncomfortable makes me suspect you feel the same.