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  #26  
Old Jul 21, 2014, 06:55 PM
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waiting4 waiting4 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djinn8 View Post
Your right. I was just getting stressed out. The stuff I said wasn't necessarily true. I think she's simply heading down that route, but not having much success. She's not riding the cock carousel or anything.

She messaged me back as well. Said she just wanted to be friends and asked if I wanted to go to a gig with her. I told her that was OK and would love to. She got really excited then, like she didn't expect me to say yes

So yeah, got a date this friday (probably), though just as friends (which I don't mind - her company was what I wanted, not her body).

So a happy beginning I hope
Hey that's fantastic!! And don't count out the possibilities just yet.

Go as a 'friend'. You may find yourself something more at the end of the date....and if you're still just a friend, congratulate yourself...the awkward part is over, it was definately a learning moment...and you got someone you enjoy being with at the end of it (which doesn't always happen, I'm sure you know).

Have a great time, and keep us posted...you know we want to know!! hehe
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Sometimes the opening of wings is more frightening than the challenge against gravity. Both make you free..............the secret is perception.
Thanks for this!
Djinn8, healingme4me, Maria38Divine, unaluna

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  #27  
Old Jul 21, 2014, 08:04 PM
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A Red Panda A Red Panda is offline
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I know you were frustrated, but it sure sounds like you have an overall negative view of women.... jumping to such horrible conclusions about someone so quickly because you feel rejected... that won't lead to your own happiness at all!

That said - I'm glad that she got back to you and that she does want to be friends. That might explain why she has been somewhat avoiding you - when she met you, she seemed interested and you weren't. By the time you were interested, she had lost interest and might have been feeling really awkward and trying to quietly discourage you. But now it's out in the open, so a friendship is genuinely possible now!

Good luck with just being friends!
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"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..."

"I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am.


Thanks for this!
pbutton
  #28  
Old Jul 21, 2014, 08:19 PM
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hvert hvert is offline
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The best way to meet a more-than-friend is through a friend! Maybe you two can be wing-men for each other. Nothing makes someone more attractive than looking like they are already taken

I am glad she got back to you, even if it wasn't the answer you wanted to hear. Waiting for a response is awful, but at least you have a definite answer now and don't have to beat yourself up over a missed opportunity.
  #29  
Old Jul 22, 2014, 10:32 AM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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Crossing my fingers that Friday is a pleasant experience. Her excitement of your acceptance, does indeed, raise eyebrows on my perspective. And it's good to know, you don't objectify her, huge plus.

Keep us, up to date
  #30  
Old Jul 22, 2014, 01:16 PM
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Rose76 Rose76 is offline
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You talk about weeks going by with you "not having a chance" to ask this girl out. What you refer to as lack of opportunity sounds more like fearfulness. That's understandable . . . no one likes to be rejected, and there's always that chance. I'ld say you've sent mixed signals that may have this girl pretty confused too.

It sounds like she definitely was interested initially. My guess is that she may have gotten tired of waiting for you to make a move and figured that you may have changed your mind about her. It may be that her vanity became a bit bruised by what seemed to her like a lack of interest on your part.

From what she has been putting on her Facebook, it sounds like she is not real good at the dating game herself. So the two of you are both being real wary of each other. If you like her, go for it. I wouldn't recommend asking her to something that is weeks away . . . or that puts her on a date with you around a bunch of other people. Just suggest something real casual like a cup of coffee . . . or a bite to eat. If she declines for some reason, consider that the reason might be true, and ask a second time in a no pressure kind of way.

Few things about a man impress females more than confidence and also the willingness to take a chance. Sometimes you have to fake the confidence.
  #31  
Old Jul 23, 2014, 05:12 PM
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Maria38Divine Maria38Divine is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djinn8 View Post
Your right. I was just getting stressed out. The stuff I said wasn't necessarily true. I think she's simply heading down that route, but not having much success. She's not riding the cock carousel or anything.

She messaged me back as well. Said she just wanted to be friends and asked if I wanted to go to a gig with her. I told her that was OK and would love to. She got really excited then, like she didn't expect me to say yes

So yeah, got a date this friday (probably), though just as friends (which I don't mind - her company was what I wanted, not her body).

So a happy beginning I hope
Breathing a sigh of relief for you. I'm glad the awkward part is over and you've managed to smooth things out a bit. Good luck!
  #32  
Old Jul 24, 2014, 05:35 AM
Djinn8 Djinn8 is offline
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And she just canceled on me, both the date and coming to the class.

I know why though. She says that she's not feeling well, but more likely it's because this weekend there is a festival in town. No doubt one of her friends asked if she wants to go, so she's standing me up in favor of them. Not coming to the class because then she doesn't have to lie about it. She'll probably be back the following week.

You know, I really hate this city. Three years I've been here now and I've not had a single friend. Only been invited out 4 or 5 times and most of them were by my sister. Never had an invitation I've made accepted. Never had a visitor to my house. Never visited another persons house. Of all the places I've lived, Sheffield is by far the most unfriendly and clique one I've been to. It really ruined my life coming here.

Last edited by Djinn8; Jul 24, 2014 at 06:21 AM.
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  #33  
Old Jul 24, 2014, 06:28 AM
Djinn8 Djinn8 is offline
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Just over three months to go now, till my deadline. Sculpting class is proving to be a dead-end. Going to Scarborough this weekend, perhaps I'll meet a friend there. Remade contact with a girl I dated a while back too (turned out she's married) and we're talking a bit via text. Still, not exactly feeling hopeful at the moment. Don't really think things are ever going to get better for me here.
  #34  
Old Jul 24, 2014, 04:32 PM
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waiting4 waiting4 is offline
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I'm sorry you're having a tough time...I know how it is to be in a strange place..and not knowing anyone. It can be lonely and frustrating.

3 months till your deadline? sorry, I don't know that I've read other threads you've posted, so not sure what that refers to, but if you are able to relocate at the end of that period, then maybe doing so will be helpful. Until then, just keep doing what you're doing....go to Scarborough and other places as you can. Just get out there.

You may not meet anyone 'important' at first, but just try to be open to the possibilities and open to enjoying yourself whether you 'meet' someone or not. People having a good time are 100% more approachable than someone who looks miserable.

Good luck and take care *hugs*
__________________


Sometimes the opening of wings is more frightening than the challenge against gravity. Both make you free..............the secret is perception.
Thanks for this!
Djinn8
  #35  
Old Jul 24, 2014, 04:46 PM
Djinn8 Djinn8 is offline
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Feeling a bit better now. So instead of going on a date, I'm going to the country to a nice swimming hole. Take a dip in a natural spring, get a bit of sun, enjoy a bit of nature - should be good.
  #36  
Old Jul 24, 2014, 04:58 PM
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waiting4 waiting4 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djinn8 View Post
Feeling a bit better now. So instead of going on a date, I'm going to the country to a nice swimming hole. Take a dip in a natural spring, get a bit of sun, enjoy a bit of nature - should be good.

Ok...now I'm on full out envy!!! I try to make you feel better and you counter with a freakin swimming hole, getting back to nature??? Why don't you throw in a cold drink so I can just implode straight away????? lol

I'm in work, it's hot...and I'm annoyed that the closest thing I've got to a natural spring is the machine that dispenses bottled water outside.

Have a good time....have a better time for me....you're boon companion you left behind!
__________________


Sometimes the opening of wings is more frightening than the challenge against gravity. Both make you free..............the secret is perception.
Hugs from:
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  #37  
Old Jul 24, 2014, 05:05 PM
Djinn8 Djinn8 is offline
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Don't worry Waiting4, I'll keep you in mind when I'm doing the backstroke and sipping a larger in the sun. Ha ha ha.
Thanks for this!
waiting4
  #38  
Old Jul 24, 2014, 05:18 PM
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waiting4 waiting4 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Djinn8 View Post
Don't worry Waiting4, I'll keep you in mind when I'm doing the backstroke and sipping a larger in the sun. Ha ha ha.

You do that little thing lol

And after work, when the sun has finally set, and I'm sitting on the little ledge under the waterfall of my pool...sipping a Newcastle (brit) or an Arrogant Bastard (american), whilst paddling the cool water lightly with my toes.....I'll think of you.

bwahahahahah
__________________


Sometimes the opening of wings is more frightening than the challenge against gravity. Both make you free..............the secret is perception.
Thanks for this!
Djinn8
  #39  
Old Jul 25, 2014, 04:04 AM
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A Red Panda A Red Panda is offline
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You do know there IS in fact a chance that she's sick. Jumping to conclusions is never helpful, and doesn't show much of a good opinion of this girl.

Enjoy the swimming hole!
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..."

"I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am.


  #40  
Old Jul 26, 2014, 02:34 AM
vutaikt vutaikt is offline
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Send her a private message on Facebook with a specific date request of call her
  #41  
Old Jul 26, 2014, 08:54 AM
RobG RobG is offline
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Great, relatable story. Glad to here you got, pretty much, a conclusion.
  #42  
Old Jul 26, 2014, 03:04 PM
Djinn8 Djinn8 is offline
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Originally Posted by RobG View Post
Great, relatable story. Glad to here you got, pretty much, a conclusion.
Yeah I can close the book on this one. Got the booby-prize though while adding a little more sadness to my soul. Happens way to often and makes it harder every time. Guess that's why I'm in the state I'm in. One day I'll catch a break and won't know what to do with it
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  #43  
Old Jul 26, 2014, 03:59 PM
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waiting4 waiting4 is offline
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You've got a helluva lot to offer a girl, Djinn8...the right girl, not just 'any' girl. Remember that.
__________________


Sometimes the opening of wings is more frightening than the challenge against gravity. Both make you free..............the secret is perception.
Thanks for this!
Djinn8
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