[boopsie73]

my husband and i have been married for 3-1/2 years but have been together for almost 10. we never really fight and usually have good communication. about two years ago i found some photos and videos that he had saved on our computer. i confronted him about them and said he would stop looking at those types of things but i know it's happened many times since then. it makes me feel very insecure and paranoid that he would rather have a woman like that than me. he said he sees it more as art and it's not because he is missing something from me. however, i'm not so sure. i'm not in the mood to be intimate very often so i feel like i'm pushing him into this. i know he is not seeing anyone else and i love him more than anything. i just don't know what to do. any thoughts??

[SeptemberMorn]

Boopsie, a man has needs, but I don't see the need for porno in the house. I've never allowed it; either from my boys or from my husband.

As for "art"? HA! That's really weak. Tell him to look at the old masters. They painted naked women, too. A bit more ample that we're used to today, but naked just the same. LOL

[cajun]

Boopsie, I the truth would be known the vast majority of men are in the same boat. I find the "art" excuse a bit flimsey, but what is he going to say. I'm sure your husband loves you and would never cheat. Fact of the matter is Men like to look. Admire the female body. Women think that it is because the man "wants her" instead of you. Not true at all. It is natural instinct. You may want to cut him a bit of slack on this one. If you put up a fuss about it, he will find another way to "look." From a males standpoint, at least he's not spending a bunch of money at strip clubs. I think you would be shocked if you knew the real statistics on how many married men "look." Sincerely, Cajun

[Wants2Fly]

Or you could start to enjoy looking yourself. I do. Perhaps you would be more open to intimacy?

[Rhapsody]

<font color="purple"> ((((((( HUGS ))))))) ~ ~ ~ ~ ((((((( HUGS ))))))) </font>

Just wanted to let you know that I understand how you feel and from personally experience, for my husband use to do the same thing (a ten year battle) that is now in the past (5 years and going strong) and yet it has left its damage on me and our marriage.

I have many website's & books that can help you and your husband..... PM me if you would like some of the links / titles and I will send them to you.

Plus I am always open to talk about my own experience with YOU concerning with HIS battle - when and if you want to talk... I believe in helping others with what I have had to sufferer through.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

P.S.
YOU must continue with your battle to get him to stop no matter how mad he may become.... for your love and marriage are at stake.

GOOD - Internet Filters:

LINK: http://www.afafilter.com/ (low yearly fee)

LINK: http://www.parentalcontrolbar.org/ (free)