[hurting__]

Basically what happened was, 7 months ago, my boyfriend of four years and I broke up, because I moved and that caused a lot of stress on our relationship.

After months of talking, discussing and growing up, we have finally come to the conclusion that we want one more go. This time, giving it 110%, and pushing through.

The only problem is, due to previous infidelity on his part (3 years ago) my family dislike him. My sister even went as far to tell me that she would never speak to him, and if I was to marry him, she wouldn't ever come to my wedding. What they do not understand is, he has changed. I know that like stupid, cliche ********, and maybe it is, but I am under the impression that he is a different person than he was 7 months ago. I won't be putting up with any crap, and he knows that, and still wants to try again.

I guess the question I am asking, how do I tell my family that he and I are soon to be dating again? I'm 20, and I know it's my life, but I still feel as though I should tell them and stop the lies.

(I know, judge me if you must. I know if I get hurt again, it is my fault, and I won't be asking for sympathy.)

[Bill3]

Family, just so you know, I've decided to give dating _______ one last try.

[Slamjammer]

People do change, to be sure. It's more of a "process" rather than something that happens quickly...so the question...is seven months enough time? I don't claim to know.

What has changed since your breakup? You said it was caused by your moving away...have you moved back? Do you see some special irresistible attraction to this person? Obviously you already know that the relationship will be a bumpy ride, but it is truly your decision to make.

Tell your family, and make it short and sweet. If things go well for you, they will change their opinion. If things DON'T go well....BUMMER!

[healingme4me]

What types of changes?

Can a person become less emotionally reactive, over time and effort? I believe so. Can a person have an epiphany and learn accountability behavior? I believe they can. Can people learn to undo the chains of enabling behavior? They certainly can. Change is possible.

Perhaps your family doesn't want to be privy to whatever emotional turmoil, you must have experienced, to be this adamant?

[kawaiigurl1981]

at your age you owe your family little to no explain for your romantic entanglements simply inform them you are seeing him again and if the ask why tell them that he had satisfied you that he is invested in the relationship. If they question of push back you have to tell them its your choice and you have made it.

[hurting__]

Thank you for your help everyone!

My husband married me and his family disowned him so just to let you know that this will either bring your b/f closer or further . with each other .

It's easy to say screw the family but once they are out of your life , it really dose affect both of you for the rest of your life .
Everyone of them left him and that was 20 years ago .. till this day he dose not talk to his family and it breaks my heart and makes me feel like **** . We had many fights over this and I almost called it quits .

[Lemon Curd]

When you have issues with your significant other, I wouldn't share much with the family, less is more. What happens is, you've forgiven & talked things out with him, while your family hasn't; So, in a nutshell, they're still mad at him. They hurt for you then & now, because they love you & they saw how deeply hurt you were by him. I share my serious marriage stuff with close friends & surface stuff with family. Although I do trust my one sister with stuff. I learned the hardway who to trust. Your family loves you way way lots. It'd be easy to see why they are concerned for you in a big way. That's just me. *big warm friendship hug*

[lilypup]

I have a 20 year old son. If he was dating a girl and she cheated on him, I would be very concerned if he dated her again. Cheating shows a serious disregard for someone.
If someone cheats and they've been married a while and have children, I think it is worth the effort to try to forgive and forget. But in your case, I know your family thinks (and they are right) that you can do better. Cheating prior to marriage in NOT a good sign for the future. I don't know you guys, but I want the best for you...a cheater is a red flag!