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  #1  
Old Apr 20, 2015, 07:39 AM
kelly8896's Avatar
kelly8896 kelly8896 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2014
Location: Missouri
Posts: 64
So I’ve written about this issue before. I want to ask some advice or opinions on what the next step should be.

My exhusband and I have the responsibility to split the cost of uninsured medical bills for our daughter 50/50. We also have the responsibility to split the cost of her extra-curricular activities 50/50. He refuses to help in these two circumstances. He picks and choose what he will and won’t help pay for.

He makes good money (90K) and currently is living in the basement of his girlfriend’s mother’s house, so he has no excuse as to having enough money to help pay for these items. He’s a cop and thinks that his opinion is the law and if he decides it’s not something he needs to pay for, he doesn’t.

The medical bills are a no denying cost but the extracurricular activities is what he gets really hung up on. So instead of paying me the 50% of uninsured medical costs, he just doesn’t pay anything. I’ve realized him being a cop makes him think only in black and white so if the extracurricular activity isn’t listed exactly in the divorce decree, he won’t assume the responsibility to pay it. (For example, the school soccer team is selling team spirit wear for the girls, each girl on the team typically buys a tshirt and sweats, because he sees this as a clothing item he refuses to help pay for it. I have tried to explain, this is an extra cost associated with her soccer team and he should pay half and if he and I were still together, he’d agreed to help pay for it.)

Regardless, my question is this. He currently owes me $2000 in uninsured medical and extracurricular activity costs (mainly medical costs). We’ve tried mediation before and after coming to an agreement in mediation, the lawyer wrote up the agreement, he ignored the agreement when we left and did what he wanted to anyway. So this time, instead of spending $500 to go to mediation and chancing whether he’ll follow though or not, I thought I’d take him to small claims court. The cost of going there is much less and a judge would rule on the outstanding balance, he could have a judgment but against him if he refused to pay.

Any advice or opinion on this matter would be greatly appreciated. I’d rather not do mediation or court, but he is leaving me very few choices. I’m really hurting on money. (By the way, the reason for such high medical bills on my daughter, she just had knee surgery in December because she torn her ACL and both meniscus, she’s also going through Physical Therapy which isn’t cheap, so she can play ball again in the fall.) The Physical Therapy bills keep coming in and I pay my half, but since the bill is in my name, they aren’t going to go after him.

Please help.

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  #2  
Old Apr 20, 2015, 08:12 AM
Jmatalik Jmatalik is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2015
Location: Ravenna
Posts: 25
Maybe talk to a good lawyer. If the divorce agreement states things should be a certain way and he isn't living up to it, they can make him. Or at least make things a pain in the *** for him. But sadly the longer you wait to bring this to the courts attention the harder it will be for them to enforce it.

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  #3  
Old Apr 20, 2015, 09:03 AM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 46,298
It certainly sounds like a contempt case for family probate.

Was just telling my oldest that his father appreciates the value of putting aside differences with me, for their sake. It's hurting the children when parents don't contribute doing the right and morally just thing.

Sorry you are going through this.

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  #4  
Old Apr 20, 2015, 09:45 AM
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Rose76 Rose76 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 12,847
Small claims court sounds like an excellent idea. Be well prepared. Make sure you have everything with you that the judge will want to see. I don't see how he can possibly get out of paying his share of medical costs. Be sure and bring proof of what the divorce decreed that he pay.
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