[ErikEverhard]

About 5 years ago, I went through this pain. Falling in love with a woman who was in a relationship at the time, but being told the entire time that when she left him we would be together. Well, that definitely did not end well she stayed with the guy, and it just sunk me even deeper into depression and therapy. I swore I would never be in a situation again like that, because it literally almost killed me.

Well my God, I am in the same situation again. Having became friends with someone, and have ended up being in love with that person. It is so painful being friends now with her, because I want more but she is in a relationship. I totally do not believe you pick who you fall in love with or develop feeling for. I have always said you could walk into a room with a 100 people, but there will that one person that you are drawn to. I keep telling myself just to walk away from the situation, but at the same time if I do than I lose a friend that means a great deal to me. I am seeing a psychiatrist for depression, but this situation I am in is a double edged sword. I am happy when I am around her, but also miserable.

If anyone has been in this type of Unrequited Love situation than you know it is pure hell. It is simply living life to suffer. Suffering.

Oh my gosh - I wrote a long reply and the internet ate it.

Yes, I've been there - it was a very long time ago, but I haven't forgotten the pain of it. I agree that it is excruciating, it is hell.

I stayed friends in my situation, too, and it turned out to prolong the pain. Later on, I looked back and wished that I had had the strength to cut off contact with the person. I had a bad episode of depression afterwards and pretty much lost the ability to have any kind of relationship for 3-4 years during a time of my life when I would have liked to be looking for someone for a long-term relationship.

I think people who are prone to have serious depressive episodes do well to be careful emotionally. I know that sounds "chicken", but I'm basing it on painful experience. I used to be somewhat of an emotional risk-taker, someone who really loved the adrenalin rush that comes from risky relationships, but it was very destructive.

[unaluna]

The only people you CANNOT pick are your ancestors. Everybody else is optional.

[ErikEverhard]

Originally Posted by jo_thorne

Oh my gosh - I wrote a long reply and the internet ate it.

Yes, I've been there - it was a very long time ago, but I haven't forgotten the pain of it. I agree that it is excruciating, it is hell.

I stayed friends in my situation, too, and it turned out to prolong the pain. Later on, I looked back and wished that I had had the strength to cut off contact with the person. I had a bad episode of depression afterwards and pretty much lost the ability to have any kind of relationship for 3-4 years during a time of my life when I would have liked to be looking for someone for a long-term relationship.

I think people who are prone to have serious depressive episodes do well to be careful emotionally. I know that sounds "chicken", but I'm basing it on painful experience. I used to be somewhat of an emotional risk-taker, someone who really loved the adrenalin rush that comes from risky relationships, but it was very destructive.

Well you just exactly described what happened to me before, and exactly what is going on with me now. Nearly everything you said fits me perfectly. I too have bad and extreme episodes of depression and like I said in my case, if I break away than I am depressed, if I stay friends I am depressed. Simple hell.