what to say or do

I have a friend that has depression and anxiety. They have really isolated, to the point I don't know what to do to help them. I care about them alot but need help so I know what I do helps and won't make them more upset or depressed.
I send small messages and thought about a card or something. They do not often respond to the messages. I just care but don't know what to to other then let them know I am thinking about them and care.
Please help!

Have you tried visiting?

It sounds like they are in a major depressive episode which can be dangerous. First, they do need to know that you're there for them. They won't be as responsive as normal because they simply can't respond, but it helps knowing someone is there. Text messages, a card and such are all you really can do unless they come to you.

Now, if they completely stop responding, then I agree with Ganganthefatman in that you need to visit just to check up on their safety.

I have tried. They usually say no and make some obvious excuse. Two days ago I didn't ask just said I was stopping to bring coffee and dinner. They tried to act upset but started talking and they seemed to appreciate it.

Should I keep asking or just say it more as a sentance? Is it helpful to visit in person more then just a text?

Thanks. Do I just say things like, hope your doing good or ask how they are? Is it too much to tell them how important they are to me? I want to do what is helpful and not hurt them more.

Both. You both want to ask how they're doing (giving them the chance to respond if they feel up to it) and just saying, "I hope your day is going okay." I wouldn't push too much, but in my experience (I've been through more major depressive episodes than I can count) it helps to hear that you're important to someone and also remind them that you're there if they want to talk or just get an ice cream or something. The key is not to push, it has to come from your friend's side.

I think that makes the most sense! Continue to offer and check in but not push. Thank you!

You sound like a great friend! I'm glad they have you. I've been through so many depression episodes and for me, it does help to see that text message or hear that voicemail. I don't always respond back, but I appreciate that someone cares enough to take time out of their day to text or call.

Good luck! I hope your friend feels better soon