Ugly things done in the name of romance

I heard romance can make people irrational. I did not understand this before. Until recently, I thought I am able to take the high road,
I have very few close friends whom I can open up to. Unfortunately I started to feel attracted to one of them but he is not able to reciprocate. What hurts is that once I confessed my feelings to him, he started to distance me in a way that feels cruel. He avoids talking with me and tried to end our discussions. He tries to cut off our time spent together. He started to ignore my messages that express closeness. I know he does not want me to misunderstand our closeness. It is difficult for me to accept the sudden denial of the rosy possibilities of romance. It is unbearable when one of the few people you feel comfortable with starts to keep you at a distance.
I know it is my fault that I depend on only a few friends, and I would have few options left when things don't go well with one of them. I reacted rather immaturely by fanatically texting and calling him, asking what I did wrong, and what I can do to restore our relation back to before. I must have made him very uncomfortable. I know I am responsible for that. What makes me sad is that I feel he does not care about hurting me. At events he ignored me and flirted with other people in front me. I went out and used threats of physical harm. This is a horrible move and makes things even worse. I am no longer able to stand on the moral highland to protect myself. Now he has rights to ignore me and I just deserve it.
I feel like there is nothing I can change. This is scary because anyone you are once close to can suddenly drift away and say there is nothing you can change. If you force it things just get worse.
Friendships were easier when I was younger. It just happened naturally. Children were able to make up after fights. But this time I feel I lost my friend forever. He is polite but cold, and keeps reminding me how I deserve this suffering.
Maybe I am just trying to justify the things I did. But my faults have caused me pain. I feel so twisted, and I am disappointed in myself. I want to organize my thoughts. I sometimes hope to repair this friendship so that I can still see him, but sometimes I do not want to be related to him at all.

Hello DawnCrimson: Yes, from what you wrote, you did do some things that probably damaged your relationship with this person. However, from what you wrote, he's also not handling the situation in the most mature manner either. Reminding you of how "you deserve this suffering" is really crummy. Unfortunately, there may not be anything you can do about the situation. And continuing to try may simply make matters worse. So my thought would be that it may be better to try to just let things go at this point. Perhaps, at some later time, your relationship can be repaired, once you have each had time to heal. So I would simply like to send some warm thoughts your way with the hope that you will be able to resolve your conflicted feelings.

He just wants to be left alone. And with the threats, you probably scared him a bit. I would forget about any romance with this guy quick if you want to save whatever future you might have left. You should probably give him some space until you're feelings have calmed down. The things you said and did are pretty fresh and just need time to cool off.

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Um....yeah....let him go.

I think you just need to let him go at this point. You threatened him with physical harm....at this point the relationship is unhealthy for both of you. I know it hurts to lose a friend.