So its been a few weeks since I ask my husband to leave.....the fourth time in 10 months..... I wonder what is wrong with me for not putting my foot down sooner and for taking him back time after time. I think it was out of shear desperation to make this marriage work. he is very much a jekyll and hyde and it was all of the great moments that I was clinging to for dear life. He is calling me every day and still trying to exercise control over the phone.....insisting I "report in" and let him know what I am doing. He is an emotional wreck and very unstable. I am trying to keep the peace and not do anything to set him off or test his limits of what he may be capable of. I called his therapist and briefly told her of my safety concerns. She will allow me to participate in his sessions at his request by phone. I feel the need to tell her what he has done and the behaviors I have seen. As a professional I know she will recognize them as potentially dangerous and hopefully help me cope with his emotional instability.

I am so worn out from all of the drama....I still have two children to take care of and my degree to finish....not to mention a job to find. I have had insomnia and panic attacks before finally going to sleep.....I feel horrible. What I need is my space and time to recover.....he is already asking to come home. It is a nightmare for me right now. I am angry, heartbroken, exhausted, confused, betrayed and alone.....

[JustJenny]

Originally Posted by Plumprincess

What I need is my space and time to recover.....he is already asking to come home. It is a nightmare for me right now. I am angry, heartbroken, exhausted, confused, betrayed and alone.....

Don't go back until you are ready. If you are feeling so bad right now try to distance yourself from him for a week or two. Do not talk to him, do not meet with him. When we are in extreme stress we find it hard to deal with almost anything in life and making good decisions is extremely challenging. Recovering from stress takes time and distancing yourself from the main source of stress is a key component to recovery.

Do you have anybody to help you with your kids? How long can you live away from him (i.e. is this "alone time" restricted)?

You said you are working on your degree. Are you productive right now? If so - concentrate on that. If not - take a break from it, too. Your health is important, if you don't recover all the challenges will keep on dragging you down.

Originally Posted by JustJenny

Don't go back until you are ready. If you are feeling so bad right now try to distance yourself from him for a week or two. Do not talk to him, do not meet with him. When we are in extreme stress we find it hard to deal with almost anything in life and making good decisions is extremely challenging. Recovering from stress takes time and distancing yourself from the main source of stress is a key component to recovery.

Do you have anybody to help you with your kids? How long can you live away from him (i.e. is this "alone time" restricted)?

You said you are working on your degree. Are you productive right now? If so - concentrate on that. If not - take a break from it, too. Your health is important, if you don't recover all the challenges will keep on dragging you down.

I have no one close to me to even help watch the kids or get them off to school while I work........I was way to dependent on him and now I am in trouble....

[Epichelper]

Use the power of the internet to find help!

[Mygrandjourney]

IMHO, it is him who needs to demonstrate to you his commitment to getting and staying healthy and safe. You will need to decide when you've seen enough concrete evidence that that is the case.