How can you explain this pattern of behavior.

This man has been married 3 times. The first 2 wives filled the divorce, and the reason was because he was not interested in any sex Of any kind with them.
He meets this third woman, they have a not so active sexual life, but after 1 year of their relationship he also stops having sex with her. The rejected wife tries everything, but nothing seems to help. On the second year of the relationship the wife finds out the husband has been cheating one her. He begs pardon and says that he had 2 intercouses with the other woman, and that the rest was only sexting. The wife decides to give him a second chance, but one year passes and he keeps avoiding sex.

Can anyone explain this behavior? Is he a compulsive liar, sex addicted or ED?

Multiple possibilities, but here is one suspicion and some facts.

Assuming that you are the current wife in the story, for ease of writing:

Suspicion: The previous wives filed for divorce because he cheated on them. Unless they told you with their own mouths that they filed due to lack of sex, very high chance it was actually due to cheating.

Facts:

1. Your husband doesn't care about your basic needs.
2. Your husband doesn't care about your emotional health.
3. Your husband doesn't care about your physical health (STDs, anyone?)
4. Your husband doesn't respect you, and will betray you behind your back.

Some may argue that these are not facts, and from say a purely objective angle, I agree. But when it comes to relations with other people, people will teach you about themselves through their choices and actions. Period.

But you give the impression that you might be the codependent type, feeling like it's your mission to figure him out and fix him. But the reality is that you are not his parent, not his doctor, not his therapist. You are his wife.

It is his responsibility to figure out his own problems, including getting professional help if needed. It is his responsibility to have respect, empathy and integrity.

Your responsibility is to decide if you think it's okay to dedicate so much of your life, energy and love to someone who doesn't respect you and doesn't care about you. That is where your thoughts ought to be right now, in terms of what is healthy.

Closeted and won't admit the truth so he bounces from woman to woman?

I never spoke to them. I only heard it from him and other friends in common. He told me that the first wife cheated on him, because they had no sexual life. Not too long ago we were watching a video on his iPad and a message from his ex popped up. It was some link about women living on a sexless marriage. It is all so confusing.

He cheated on first two wives and that's why they left him. Sure maybe he didn't have sex with them because he had it with other women or maybe he lied about why they divorced him.

He then meets third wife and once again cheats on her.

I don't see what's confusing here. Even if he didn't cheat on first two wives, and really does it matter what he did in his previous marriages? He cheats on his third wife. And that what matters and should be a concern for his third wife.

I'd say it's good he avoids sex as it is too scary to have sex with cheaters: STD etc

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I would call him a cheater, plain and simple. It doesn't sound to me as though his assertion that he didn't cheat on the first two wives is particularly reliable information. After all, he only admitted to cheating on wife number 3 because he got caught. This doesn't make him a credible witness in my opinion. It sounds like he has always been a cheater with a short attention span, and he has likely always been getting sex somewhere at any given time, the only question being from whom at what time and why would he let that kind of secret-keeping corrupt the quality of his marriage(s)?

Best of luck to wife number 3. I think I'm going to keep staying single...

Or he could be gay?

I think ChipperMonkey nailed the reason.

Is there a reason why the 3rd wife decided to forgive him? Do they have kids? Is he a great man outside the bedroom? Is she scared of being single again?

He could be gay. But not every cheater who sleeps with other women but not with his wife is gay. I dare to say 99.99% aren't

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He does not like sex at all. He does not like intimacy.
He does like control. He has BIG problems.

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We don't know if he likes sex or not. He might like sex with someone else rather than his wives

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He's a strange person. Very controlling, gets upset for small details and complaints about everything and everyone.

Control freak?

He's "conquered" the wife so there's no fun in sex with her. Cheating gives him a feeling of conquering someone new.

Question is what is his third wife planning on doing? He clearly isn't changing

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She is preparing herself to leave

Wise woman! Best of luck!

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