So kindhearted and nice to others ended up being abused and disrespected.

Not only abused and disrespected but also mistreated even from younger people sometimes.

I usually have good intentions towards others, I am a very spontaneous person, talking also about my fears and what I am thinking about, now I am the most miserable and lonely person.

I am usually so kind to others and want them to feel comfortable, very helpful, but what I found in return just hatred and disrespect (the majority of people, more than 70%).

I like to talk a lot and have fun with people, I like to say funny things and make people laugh, it seems that I lost my respect, they don't fear me at all.

How to amend my personality? how to deal with this evil world that is full of hatred and harmful people? people take advantage of me.

How can I adjust my self? how to tune my personality?

I feel that I came to a wrong world, why this life is so unfair?

Start over. Listen to people. Let them talk more. Be interested in what they say. Dont talk so much about yourself. Also it is much easier!

It would be helpful to hear some specific examples of you being considerate and engaging and receiving hatred in return.

You say that you help people frequently... Do you help them when they ask for help or when you assume they need help?

i once tried to help an old lady with her groceries because she was overloaded in her cart and she yelled at me!!! i never felt so stupid and unwanted in my life. i think that day i decided not to help anyone unless they asked first.

If you are kind and nice you shouldn't change yourself at all. I am a little shocked though that people hate you? Same as Bill I wonder if you have examples? What type of help do you offer to them? And why do they need help? I don't understand if you are being nice to people why would they disrespect you?

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May be I was exaggerating when I said they hate me, they just take advantage of me, I have been abused. I mean that People feel that I am week and they can disappoint me whenever they want, depending in the situation.

What do you mean they take advantage of you? Do you have problems saying "No" to people?

What do you mean by being abused? Verbally? Physically?

How come people disappoint you? Do you have any expectations from them? And what people are you talking about - family, friends, colleagues, strangers?

You should be a little bit more specific. As Bill3 said a specific example would be helpful.

People do it because it suits them. And they don't feel guilty or bad because you don't say anything or express yourself in any way.

Imagine an (exaggerated) situation where someone takes advantage of you or treats you badly. And you started crying really hard and telling this person things like "why are you doing this to me? please answer me! why are you so mean? don't you see it hurts me when you do that!".

This person would immediately be taken aback, then feel really bad and uncomfortable. It's because you overwhelmed them with strong emotions. Most people would apologize.

You are closed off. You keep these things to yourself. They can't recognize that you have feelings (and they often do anything to avoid knowing this). So they keep doing this because they think you are okay with this treatment.

There is nothing wrong with your personality, just your way of functioning. It's probably a defense mechanism you developed as a child. You need to open up, show emotions and express your desires with your words.

Are you seeing a therapist ?

I made a A LOT of assumptions here.

Its a reality that people do tend to treat "nice" people by walking all over them.

I prefer to try and be a nice person, but set firm boundaries.

I recently helped someone by listening to her problems for a long time (she was going through a divorce). Because she spent so much time talking to me, I mistakenly believed she was a "friend". Then, when I needed help from her, she lashed out at me for no reason and informed me coldly that we were not friends. It turns out she was just using me as a shoulder to cry on for a while, and then she moved on. She found other people to use. I've since learned she has a history of moving on, she has no long term friends, she gets mad and holds grudges against people. She moves on to new people, then gets mad at them and stops talking to them. Its an endless cycle in her life. But the only reason I found out all this, was because I happened to know someone else who knows her. She did the same thing to this person.

What I've learned is that I will never again try to be someone's therapist, and if they have emotional issues that are unresolved, I will just tell them I am not a licensed counselor and don't have the background to deal with their issues. And leave it at that.

I've also stopped loaning money, giving expensive things to people, or letting people borrow my stuff. Because they read this as "she's easy to walk all over; if I got this out of her, what else can I get from her"? That is, unfortunately, the nature of some people. They are very simple minded and believe that if a person does something nice for them, they can get more and better out of that person.

Why must they fear you?

Do you assert yourself and decline to do things for others, when it's really not something of interest to you? Are you assertive in telling others when they are out of bounds with you?

It's necessary to know how to stand up for yourself.

About trying to make others laugh, is that part of the dilemma?

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There's a big different between being nice and being a fool.

Being nice is benefiting others. That's perfectly fine.

Being a fool is letting others harm you. That's not right.

You're never a fool by being nice.

I do understand how it happens that significant others might take advantage or family. I don't understand how strangers could. In what circumstances?

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If you're a nice person without boundaries, people will take advantage of you. They will see your generosit and keep pushing for more and more and more. No, not everyone is like this, but there are people out there who will do this.

I think the issue is not having boundaries. There is NOTHING wrong with being nice. However, if people are ungrateful for your kind actions, then its time to step back. If people see that you're being nice and keep pushing boundaries to get more from you, then its time to step back.

You literally have to be able to say "eff this shyte" and walk away if someone isn't grateful, won't say thank you, and keeps on pushing for even more. Like I said, there are users out there and they know how to spot someone to take advantage of from a mile away.

Relationships of any kind are a two way street. If people are always taking from you and never giving, you have to be willing to say "goodbye".