Interesting study just out shows that a lot of friends on FB aren't "real" and don't care about you, other than 4-5 people who you're closest to
Facebook friends are almost entirely fake, study finds | News | Lifestyle | The Independent
I'm glad I don't have an account, it seems almost addictive, judging by the people I know who are trying to "quit" using it.

What do you think - has FB helped you, or made you feel worse?

This I already knew ever since this surveillance tool called "Facebook" came out.

I created a FB account in 2007, I sign in once every couple of months just to keep it going, and the only "friend" I have on it is actually my wife.

I created that account out of fear of online identity theft. And so I also have a Twitter account for the same reason. I don't want to wake up one day to find out that my real life reputation has been trashed overnight by some Internet vandal.

FB doesn't exist to "help" anyone, it's a very profitable business that preys on people's vanity and insecurities.

[Webgoji]

It's well documented here on Psych Central that I utterly loathe FB. It has been the source of more of our marital problems than anything else.

[divine1966]

I am not on Facebook. No I am not backwards lol I just know I have a bit of obsessive nature and know I would be on there too much as I am too much on PC and have been on other forums in the past ha So I never had an account on FB

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I have moved around a lot. Consequently I have real life aquaintances from all over. FB is how we keep in touch with what we are all doing.

I agree though about the tendancy for 'fakeness' on the site. I myself don't have any 'friends' that I don't actually know in real life. Consequently my circle is quite small and rather tightly knit. I feel more protected that way too.

Lately though, I have considered abandoning it. It has become a haven for vindictive and hateful and politically motivated fodder that leaves me saddened, irate, and stressed. I am turning to it less and less while at the same time I have resumed the lost art of letter writing.

I hand write letters to my bestest friends - and for really special ones, I use a fountain pen!

[A Red Panda]

I would never accept a friend request from someone I don't know. Facebook is what you make of it - I view it as a way to keep up to date on people who I don't see or talk to often, and they can keep up with my life. I'm fine with that.

I also add people I interact with on a regular basis who are just aquaintances. I also use facebook to keep up to date on community things - my city has it's own facebook page which keeps up to date on things such as upcoming events, reminders about garbage pickup, updates on water breaks, etc.

There is nothing harmful about facebook if it's being used responsibly really.
Don't add people you don't know.
Don't expect a deeper relationship with someone than you already had.
Don't post things that are inappropriate.
Don't instigate drama through passive-aggressive posts.
Don't focus on it being a popularity tool.
Don't say things that you wouldn't say to everyone in person.
Don't air someone else's dirty laundry.
Don't post pictures that you aren't ok with everyone you know seeing.
Don't engage in trolling behaviors, political/religious debates, etc unless you are able to remain calm, respectful, and not take things personally.
Maintain healthy boundaries.
Use common sense, etc.

Like pretty much everything else in life, it's what you make of it. That's at least how I choose to view it, so I enjoy having facebook.

[BeaFlower]

I don't use fb very often, but I have to say that it has been useful for me, because I discovered PC through a link that someone posted there So, fb indirectly helped me
But I agree with what Red Panda said. It's better to use fb to keep in touch with friends that you already have, not to hope to find new 'real' friends. Maybe sometimes it can happen, but I think it's very difficult.

Your FB friends are only fake if you are friending people you don't really know in real life (I don't understand why anyone would do that honestly.)

I find the people I know who use FB are like me. They keep up with family who might be a distance away. They keep up with old coworkers and friends they don't get to see anymore. They don't friend random strangers. They don't have a jillion "friends" on FB, but instead have a smaller set of friends who they actually know and care about.

[venusss]

I friend people whom I don't know because lately I mostly use my FB for my activism, so of course I will end up with lots of friends of friends of friends or simply people who like my photos from events and stuff.

Some people don't need facebook to be fake.

Also, it depends what you define as fake. Not airing my personal issues over social media is to me decent behavior, not fakeness for example.

[IrisBloom]

O yes, it is a breeding ground for people to make themselves look grander than they really are. I use it to keep in touch with my kids who are far away and other relatives and friends that I don't see often. I have met new friends thru FB, but I have no problem deleting those who are only on there to post what they eat and such. And those who seem to take every opportunity to put others down while patting themselves on the back. I don't post much, when I do it's usually a joke or something I found meaningful. Just like other things in life, if used right, it's harmless.

[marmaduke]

Fb a narcissists dream.
All those selfies.
Then all the fake 'Oh you look so beauiful' blah blah blah.

Hate that dreadful pout that seems to be the fashion.

An aquataince of mine was very upset last year.
He noticed on Facebook that his large circle of friends from uni were all at a reunion party, having a great time.
He was the only one that had NOT been invited. He was really hurt and pissed at them (he is very full of himself, he has to be centre of attention)
That's when Fb becomes toxic. People family, friends, can use it in an passive/aggressive way.

I have a Fb account but rarely post anything personal. Like venuss I use it to talk to likeminded people. In my case Animal Wefare issues and wildlife conservation.

Sent from my SM-N910F using Tapatalk

Originally Posted by Little Cat

Interesting study just out shows that a lot of friends on FB aren't "real" and don't care about you, other than 4-5 people who you're closest to
Facebook friends are almost entirely fake, study finds | News | Lifestyle | The Independent
I'm glad I don't have an account, it seems almost addictive, judging by the people I know who are trying to "quit" using it.

What do you think - has FB helped you, or made you feel worse?

I think using FB responsibly is helpful for some people to connect. I just added people who I knew personally when I had an account. Not random people. But I didn't find FB helpful for me though, because my interests are different than my "fiends'" list.

[scatterbrained04]

My Facebook friends consist of family and old friends (most of them from high school). I don't accept requests from people I don't know. I don't really have any problems with it, but I did like it better when it wasn't as much viral videos and what not.

I agree with what Red Panda stated as well as marmaduke. It's best to NEVER add anyone on there that you barely know, or worse yet, have never met in person.

Be sure to add a second step verification to get sent to your phone. Adjust your privacy settings. If you really want to be extra careful like I was most of the time, use a fake name or a purpossely mispelled version of your name, or a nickname that isn't that well known.

So if you get hacked, or you don't want just anyone to find you, this is great- I got hacked a year or two ago and I wasn't even aware of that until three months later! I was able to sign in, but someone from Mexico was using a different phone that I was to access my pics and videos.

That was scary as hell! I tried in vain to reset my account, and I even tried to change my user name, but the email kept on chaning to m.facebook.com under vulgar names that was partially blanked out, or weird ones at craigslist.com.

I was the only one with the p.w to that account, and the only personal info that I had up there was my email and phone number. I don't get how it was hacked. I only added a couple of people that I didn't know on there, but I quickly deleted them after awhile. One guy just kept on posting the most disgusting things on there.

Also, hardly anyone would like my comments or pics. I felt as if I were talking to myself. I deleted a ton of people just because 97% of them were aquaintences. Also, a few guys on there liked to troll online, so I didn't really trust them after awhile.

I got so fed up with FB and all the b.s and look at me crap, that I deleted it. I couldn't reset anything, so I closed my account. OMG, that was a major hassle!

How do people manage to hack into one's FB account and prevent them from resetting their p.w? Has this ever happened to any of you?

Also, there are sites that charge people to make it appear if they have a lot of friends. Wow, how sad! FB is full of attention seekers and passive-agressive people, people who only want to appear popular, boring people, annoying people who like to just send you game requests, braggers, narcissictic people, spammers, fake idiots, etc...

Twitter sucks too. I've been hacked twice on there! Thank goodness that I never used my real name or posted any personal info on there! UGH!!!!

Originally Posted by Shy Introvert

How do people manage to hack into one's FB account and prevent them from resetting their p.w? Has this ever happened to any of you?

Shortly after I created my account in 2007, I deactivated it because I had no intention to use it.

I forgot all about it until 2013, when I checked my e-mail one morning and found a long list of messages from FB, one saying I had "one more step to complete before I could use FB", and another one welcoming me back to it.

I immediatelly reported it wasn't me, using the link provided on the message. And after following the procedures, I had control of the account again.

I signed in to find about 50 people added as "friends" to my account, and spent the rest of that morning deleting everyone, changing stuff that the hacker had changed to suit himself, and setting up a two-step verification using my phone.

I never learned what really happened because FB staff won't tell details to anyone, but my best guess is that FB makes your user name available a few months after you deactivate your account. Someone with the same name as me (or probably wanting to impersonate me for God knows what reason) picked up that name and used it, then FB sent copies of the activation messages to my e-mail. I said "copies" because the hacker had already changed the e-mail and password to his own, but if it wasn't for that, I'd never know until it was too late.

Now I log in every so often just to keep it going, seeing that FB policies seem to be a bit too sketchy.

Hey littlecat, I think you raise some really good points. I do use facebook but it's mostly a directory of contacts, only a small handful are true friends and a couple of my closest friends aren't even on there. It's all about expectations imo.

It is very useful for making social/sports arrangements with groups of people, and also keeps those who are dear but far flung away from us in touch. I got to see my beautiful new baby cousin born the other side of the world care of facebook. So there is plenty usefulness and good to be had.

It's a case of sorting the wheat from the chaff imo.

I don't friend people I haven't met but don't look down on those who do - after all all of my friends on pc are folk I've never met.

Thank you for all the fascinating replies and different perspectives!

I don't have a family, and few friends, and my work keeps me in contact with most of my colleagues past and present, as well as LinkedIn. So I'm not on FB. I saw a photo recently which summed up my attitude to social media. It was a parade where there were barriers by the side of the road, and everyone was holding up their smartphone to film or take photos. Except for a white haired old lady, who was just watching everything in the parade, and smiling. No one else was because they were too fixated on capturing a perfect shot. It was entitled "living in the moment" Photo of an old woman in a crowd goes viral for reminding the Internet that the real world exists. | Web | Someecards

[OneInBillions]

Honestly I hate Facebook. I mean I've never been good with people so I don't even have that many fake friends, let alone real ones -- I've got a total of 29, most of whom I haven't heard from or seen in over a decade. And the friends I do hear from are really different from me these days; I've changed a lot over the years, while they haven't.

I'm tempted to just close my account and leave it but I do participate in one or two interesting "groups."

[Steiner of Thule]

This thread reminded me to unfriend some idiots I don't care at all about. Though some days I do consider just closing my account because I really don't wish to keep in contact with some people.

[Septembersrain]

I have almost 800 people. I think we all collect each other through schools, jobs, random encounters, etc.

That's what makes it fun. You're not really a part of what they are going through but it's like a window into their lives. Happy moments, sad days, funny stuff, all of it keeps it interesting.

I work in a call center, I think reading about other people's lives helps keep me partially sane.

Sent from my iPhone 6s using Tapatalk.

Originally Posted by BuildABridge

Shortly after I created my account in 2007, I deactivated it because I had no intention to use it.

I forgot all about it until 2013, when I checked my e-mail one morning and found a long list of messages from FB, one saying I had "one more step to complete before I could use FB", and another one welcoming me back to it.

I immediatelly reported it wasn't me, using the link provided on the message. And after following the procedures, I had control of the account again.

I signed in to find about 50 people added as "friends" to my account, and spent the rest of that morning deleting everyone, changing stuff that the hacker had changed to suit himself, and setting up a two-step verification using my phone.

I never learned what really happened because FB staff won't tell details to anyone, but my best guess is that FB makes your user name available a few months after you deactivate your account. Someone with the same name as me (or probably wanting to impersonate me for God knows what reason) picked up that name and used it, then FB sent copies of the activation messages to my e-mail. I said "copies" because the hacker had already changed the e-mail and password to his own, but if it wasn't for that, I'd never know until it was too late.

Now I log in every so often just to keep it going, seeing that FB policies seem to be a bit too sketchy.

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Wow, sorry to hear that! FB shouldn't allow anyone to ever be able to use a hacked account again unless they really are the person they claim to be! It is a good idea to either delete unused accounts or to go on there once a week maybe. I just found out that my twitter account got hacked again, ugh!

Again, I used a fake name and I had no friends on there, thank god. I posted no pics up this time of myself as well! I also just had an email account hacked, ugh! I hate hackers! They suck! I don't know why anyone would target me like that. It doesn't feel random to me. I have no real enemies that I can think of these days. Weird! I could do nothing to change the email under the pic and video settings no matter what.

I felt so violated! Nothing worked for me, so I had to give up on FB and delete my account! I hope that hacker isn't using my pics or pretending to be me. It doesn't look like my old accounts are up, but it could be hidden for all I know. Thankfully I used a fake name!

Originally Posted by Septembersrain

I have almost 800 people. I think we all collect each other through schools, jobs, random encounters, etc.

That's what makes it fun. You're not really a part of what they are going through but it's like a window into their lives. Happy moments, sad days, funny stuff, all of it keeps it interesting.

I work in a call center, I think reading about other people's lives helps keep me partially sane.

Sent from my iPhone 6s using Tapatalk.

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It is amusing to see some people's posts. I do miss some of the people on there, but my safety comes first. Long story short, my account was hacked, and there was nothing that FB could do to resolve the issue. This hacker had access to my pics and videos, ugh! I felt so violated!

My FB "friends" were just aquaintences, so I didn't feel comfortable giving out my personal info to them to keep in touch. Especially since they rarely ever contacted me. I'm glad to hear that FB keeps you sane! Working at a call center can be so boring at times! I know the feeling as I used to work in one years ago.

I was thinking of this post today when the weirdest thing happened to me, I checked my phone and it said 'such and such person' (that's my version of anonymising) has accepted your friendship request.

Except I didn't knowingly send a request to this woman who I had never heard of, I'm guessing my phone must have sent the request accidently from the suggested friends list, maybe knocked in my pocket, easily done with a touch screen. Pretty sure I wasn't hacked as nothing else was amiss.

The strangest thing was that despite not knowing me at all (not even interacting in an online capacity) she accepted the request! No wonder she had over 1000 friends - well one more and then one less within the space of a couple of hours.

[MiddayNap]

Goodness, who would have thought that people who only interact with you via text and various vacation photographs don't hold you to be their truly, dearest, go-to-prison-in-your-place, friend? Next, they'll have a study which claims cashiers don't really care whether or not their customers found everything alright.