[HelloWorld18]

So my boyfriend and I were dating for a month and a half, when I found out that he kept his two exs phone numbers in his phone.

He told me that he hadn't dated a guy for a year, when in reality, he had a boyfriend 3 months before we went on our first date, he said he didn't want me feeling like the 'rebound' because he got badly hurt in that relationship (his boyfriend just suddenly blocked him from everything), he said he keeps his previous boyfriend phone number because he thinks that his ex is gonna call to apologize. Then I found out that he dated a guy 2 weeks before he met me and thats when i saw that guys phone number in his phonebook. There was no fancy name, it was just their first (not last) name, he said he didn't know the other guys last name). After I found out all this by looking at his phone, I cried for about half an hour, then thats when I woke him up and talked to him about it. He said he didn't want me to know how 'unexperienced' he was. His first relationship was a month and his second was 3.

The sickening part about the first relationship, is he was 14 and the guy was 18 years old. Thinking this sickens me and makes me want to cry. The guy told him he found an interest in him since he was 12 years old. I told my boyfriend that he was a pedophile. And that he raped him, as he wasn't of age to provide consent. He said no, and I pointed out the 12 year old interest thing and said how do you not see it? He said that the guy wanted to keep it a secret, and i said thats because what he was doing was illegal and wrong. And he just denied it. The relationship was almost purely sexual.

[~Christina]

Is your boyfriend in therapy ? If not he should be.

Seems all the people he was involved with was before you and him got together, other than him not disclosing that it was a few months not a year .... so I dont really see any "lies" here,,,, a few omissions sure.... You have been together only 4-6 weeks , this is very very early in a relationship.

Now that you know more ... are you going to be able to offer support and give him time to hopefully work out what happened in his past with a Therapist?

[HelloWorld18]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Is your boyfriend in therapy ? If not he should be.

Seems all the people he was involved with was before you and him got together, other than him not disclosing that it was a few months not a year .... so I dont really see any "lies" here,,,, a few omissions sure.... You have been together only 4-6 weeks , this is very very early in a relationship.

Now that you know more ... are you going to be able to offer support and give him time to hopefully work out what happened in his past with a Therapist?

Im wanting to ask him if we can go to therapy but we don't have the greatest jobs to afford one

[~Christina]

I honestly dont think you and him need Therapy at this point as this is such a new realtionship ...

I would advise him to find a therapist to work through what has happened to him in his past .

Look into county mental health providers they usually have sliding scale costs for anyone seeking help.

[divine1966]

He needs therapy as he was taken advantage by s grown man! Poor guy. Other than that keeping exes phone numbers isn't a big deal plus you two are just starting dating.

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