There is someone I knew from high school that I thought wanted to reconnect. She will say she wants to hang out but then always bails out. She did that like 5 times within a period of a few months. Always a lame excuse too. And a couple times she didn't even tell me we weee no longer meeting up. A couple times I tried to meet up but the other times she was the one who tried to meet up. Also she will ignore most texts and will not follow through when she says she will text or call back. I don't really feel like I am friends, just someone to reconnect with. I am okay with not hanging out, but I am just confused at why she does that. Not sure if she is playing mind games or if she is just not interested but doesn't know how to be honest. I respect her decision, just don't want her to constantly make plans if she does not really want to. As much as I hate rejection, I actually fear being friended out of pity, politeness, or obligation even more since I've had that happen to me with other people and I don't want her to eventually do that if there are any more attempts. I stopped attempting but sometimes she still does. Just confused at what her motives are and if I am doing the right thing by no longer making any attempts.

Nobody knows the motives of others.

If I had to guess, I would say that she is just a people collector and doing this is her way of feeling popular.

Next time she asks just say "Sure. Let me know when is good for you", and then just expect the same thing to happen at a later date.

I would give her and her reasons very little thought if I were you.

[Trippin2.0]

If its really important that you know, then you should ask her why she behaves the way she does.


Only she knows

I vote you go megaton and unfriend her on Facebook.

[ThingWithFeathers]

I have a friend who does exactly the same thing. Only difference is that she calls me in emergencies and gets annoyed if I don't respond immediately. I don't get it. I just figured she was flakey. A lot of people these days are flakey. I'm never going to change her behaviour, so I have to accept that if I want to remain friends with her I have to accept that's the way she is.

I understand the confusion you feel. We have a choice to remain in the relationship or not. I started thinking maybe she is manipulating me - especially with the emergency phone calls. I haven't made a decision yet, but I have been thinking about it.

[littleowl2006]

My cousin used to be that way and I had no explanation for it. I just stopped texting her back because I was so disapponted in her.
I also have friends who are very demanding, but very unavailable themselves. I stopped investing time and effort to "fix" things.
It is like the other posters have already said: Only she knows her motives. If you feel like someone doesn't have the best intentions when contacting you, it really isn't someone you want to be around.