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yunomi
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Default Apr 19, 2016 at 11:03 AM
  #1
I think i need some advices what to do in this case. So here's the story;

We were in relationship for 8 months. i met this guy in early february last year i forgot exactly when. He was 20, 3 years younger than me. He's still in university meanwhile i'm working already. We have mutual interests and hobbies. We were getting close, had intense communication and enjoyed each other company and started to be in relationship in the next 2 months. We had feelings for each others and everything just seemed fine.

He has serious problems within his family, especially his relation with parents. His parents somewhat controlling, mean and strict about everything. Thats what stressed him the most, plus endless school's assignments. He was frustrated and feeling bad that he couldn't be there when i needed him. He felt like he's only hurting me if we continuing our relationship that way so he asked to break up and when he's ready again he wants to take me back because he really has feeling for me. I accepted it and we keep in touch. Its not as intense as we used to be.

But in these recent 2 months our conversation turned sour, he seems depressed, replying with 1 word answer such as "sigh", "idk", etc. i tried everything to cheer him up but its just not working and i got irritated by his 1 word answer. I felt like he pushed me away and that time i was stressed with my problem so i couldn't think straight and ended up overreacting and being mean to him. I said that don't bother to call me if you don't want to, i'm not here to hear your 1 word answer and whatever it is. It happened few days ago and he doesn't contact me since that day. Neither me.

Now I wonder if i hurt his feeling. I admit i feel guilty about that but i'm sick of feeling being pushed away as well. Should i call/ met him to apologize? Or should i leave him alone just in case he doesnt want to talk to me yet? And should i move on? Can't deny i still have feelings for him, Its been 4months after break up.

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Default Apr 19, 2016 at 01:46 PM
  #2
I don't know, just letting it go could be a solution.? Sometimes after a breakup, things aren't so clean and there's attempts to remain "friends." eventually these friendships just drift away. Noone is really the bad guy, noone is really the good guy, it's just the way it dissolves.
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Default Apr 19, 2016 at 05:10 PM
  #3
You are young... give yourself a lot of time... in the meantime go out with other friends and enjoy yourself... (((hugs))) tc
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Default Apr 19, 2016 at 10:12 PM
  #4
Because of his family and/or his schoolwork, he is not available for you.

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He felt like he's only hurting me if we continuing our relationship that way so he asked to break up and when he's ready again he wants to take me back because he really has feeling for me.
It does not seem like he is in any hurry to contact you. Are you sure that you want to be waiting around for a call that may never come? "When he's ready" allows him to do whatever he wants, including seeing other women if he wants to. He may never be "ready" for you. He certainly seems uninterested now.
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Default Apr 19, 2016 at 10:39 PM
  #5
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Originally Posted by Bill3 View Post
Because of his family and/or his schoolwork, he is not available for you.

It does not seem like he is in any hurry to contact you. Are you sure that you want to be waiting around for a call that may never come? "When he's ready" allows him to do whatever he wants, including seeing other women if he wants to. He may never be "ready" for you. He certainly seems uninterested now.
I thought of this too and thats why i'm kinda confused. "To wait or not" game. My mind says "move on" but my heart still says "not yet". Damn this internal conflict..

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Default Apr 19, 2016 at 11:16 PM
  #6
Have you any idea how long will your mind allow your heart to wait?

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yunomi
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Default Apr 20, 2016 at 12:04 AM
  #7
Till now i dont have an answer of it. Probably it will take some time. Well actually i dont want to wait either, i know it sounds like a false hope from him and i keep telling myself to get over it anyway and do my own things. Its not so easy for me to have feeling for someone so It took around 6 months for me to get over someone i had feelings for before. It sounds ridiculous and silly lol

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Default Apr 20, 2016 at 12:08 AM
  #8
Maybe you have two months to go?
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Default Apr 20, 2016 at 12:18 AM
  #9
Yeah i guess so

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