I am learning, but it hurts

I am sorry. Only after I posted I realized that my post could come across that way.

My post meant more that you don't want to waste your time on figuring out why people do things as you could never know for sure. I doubt the man you were talking to is in a serious relationship as you two were friends on Facebook and it would be visible if he was. But there were similarities in patterns of communication and lack of availability from the moment you started posting about him, just couldn't help it.

We can never really know. Bottom line don't waste your energy. I think you dodge the bullet here. You got out just in time. Awesome job by the way. Consider it a sign of great growth and personal accomplishment.

You decided against dating unavailable man before you got too deep. For real. Awesome job. Bet you will see less unavailable men with time. Step one done. You became aware

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I didn't even see that you'd replied before I had to come back and edit my post.

He wasn't talking to another woman. That wasn't fair of me. He may have been emotionally unavailable, feared being trapped, and didn't treat me too fairly in the end...but there wasn't another woman. He's not a bad guy and truly cared for me even if he sucked at it, and I think that I'm just slowly villainizing him in my head because it makes it easier. But he's not a villain.

I am confident there wasn't another woman in your case. Unavailable doesn't mean a jerk ( only some are, most aren't)

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