I mixed stuff and pissed my mother off again. :/

Hmm... okay so I found a makeup recipe online and so I just mixed cocoa powder and arrowroot powder and made a mess on the sponge I admit it was a little reckless and impulsive. However, I don't get the screaming at me for the last 10 minutes saying she wish she could hire someone to kill me and saying I am a curse and etc etc. She has said these kind of mean things before and to be honest she is overreacting to the entire situation she always says I do things on purpose to upset her, however I gain nothing out of antagonising her all I get is high-pitched screams in my ears that hurts like hell. Then she is like I have to change my life and get rid of me for life and then when I leave I am never going back. I guess, she has been holding in her resentment of having a disabled retarded adhd daughter because this is the first time she has reacted this way. Yes, she can get angry but she's never said I was curse and to leave. Usually, she just says I am ****ed up because I have my fathers genes. To be honest in all of this I think I should probably just leave for the day and not come back until night. To be honest she is pissed off that I eat a lot says I am a brat and I abuse her. Well, if mixing things together to make makeup make me abusive maybe I might as well own up to it. All in all I am glad that now I have volunteering work to do.

Ok mixing cocoa powder making make up sounds a bit out there but telling ones kid you want them killed is much worse, but then again you said you want to attack your mother with knives. Your household strikes me as violent and unsafe. Are there any community services involved with your family to make sure it's a safe place for everybody?

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She should get in trouble for saying that to you

I was with in foster care when younger and it is not the first time she has said something like that. When she was yelling she was saying I was crazy as well she once threatened to light me on fire maybe 1 year or two ago

She also said I should admit to the doctor I was crazy so they could lock me up. She threatened me if I don't stop making mess she will put me into the mental institution in Portugal. So, idk if I want to go to Madeira with her. To be honest she was the one who sounded crazy threatening me with hiring hitmen not me.

Normally whenever I do something stupid she threatens to record it and show it to the world like on facebook. She said if I did all these embarrassing things in Madeira she would embarrass me by telling everyone all the things I do etc.

Usually, you should be able to trust your mother but she is starting to behave like someone who has psychosis funny how she calls me crazy. I remember she would ask me if I was calling her name and I wouldn't being saying anything this would happen a few times. Sometimes she would say that she could here Daniela's voice (my sister) but then again there was just silence. I don't know if I should bother the police with these threats I was shock when she said it last night. I just went quiet when all of this was happening she was calling dad telling him I was doing naughty things. Then she told me that he was going to break my laptop if I kept on misbehaving (he bought it but its still an act of intimidation and violence breaking people's property).

She is abusing you. You should call the police

Don't know how things work in Austrailia but threatening someone's life is serious. Problem is if it's just the 2 of you, she could deny it if the police did get involved & then it's your word against hers. The good thing about getting the police involved is that THERE IS A RECORD of the complaint that might be helpful later on. Of course if she doesn't deny saying that then maybe they can get her the help she seriously sounds like she needs. Sometimes it takes getting the police involved for this to happen....sadly.

You really need to get out of there before something serious happens.

I will be going to Madeira in about a month to travel so now I have no immediate plans on leaving also financially I am stuck to leave anyway. So, until I have a good paying job my hands are tied unfortunately sometimes to save a life you need money. I hate how this world has become but hey it is how it is.

Why are you still not working

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You are going there with your MOM? How is that going to work out? if you can't stand each other at home, do you think it will be better away from home?....I mean, she is who she is also.

Any job that would get you away from your Mom for any amount of time would be more than helpful.

Yes.... why travel with a person that torments you so much?????

Yes life indeed costs money.. There are many options for getting the hell out of her house, You can work and save money......even just rent a room from someone would get you away from her.

A friend of mine was in a horrible situation living with family members . She finally got so fed up and sick and tired of the abuse, So she went out and found jobs , yes numerous jobs and she cleaned homes for anyone, did yard work etc... did she like all that work? No.. But she wasn't home getting yelled at..

I dont know the specifics of where you live and what jobs are available .. But when a person is really determined to improve there life they will find a way.. You and your Mom are very abusive to each other, and that is not healthy for anyone.

Take care

Well, I don't really have a choice I have to go and there is my extended family so it is not like I will be around 24/7. Job employability in Perth has gone down by 14% so if anyone wants to employ me that would be great but I am tired of being lectured. Why I don't have a job when you need experience to have a job. Enjoy that paradox I don't?. I am very frustrated and upset now because she has a high pitched scream and the worst part is she was yelling at my dad and bursting my ears. If I lose my hearing because of her she is paying for my hearing aid. Since she is certain that she can do whatever she wants in her house and **** what everyone thinks of it. It's common curtosity and I am sick of this ****. Farthermore I finally have a resume so I will be applying for hundreds of jobs if my poor walking feet can take me. This is how done I am with this ****** situation.

Most certainly you do have a choice. If you are a legal adult no one can make you travel anywhere. Only minor children have no choice. It's very easy not to travel if you don't want to. You just don't.

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Well I guess maybe I am saying I can't instead of i dont want to. I really want to go to this holiday and I am sure not letting my mothers attitude to stop me.