[PlannedObsolescence]

Yup. I'm gonna do it. I can't take the constant obsession anymore. I'm just gonna go for the ride and see where it takes me. I have no idea why this woman is so obsessed with me but I can't take the constant pushing and pushing to give her a chance anymore so I'm just going to give in and see where it goes. It's been going on for 3+ years and I have told her everything under the sun to leave me be but she never did. I've had 3 failed relationships since meeting her and I feel like they all failed because of the constant pressure from her, to give her a chance. Hopefully once I give her what she wants, she'll see it's not all she thought it was, and leave me alone. Funny thing is that she is 12 years younger than me, super attractive and could get any guy she wanted. Why am I her target? Because at one point, I cared about her when she was in an abusive relationship. I gave her some advice and showed a bit of compassion for her situation and then she sunk her teeth in and wouldn't take no for an answer when I constantly pushed back from her advances.

So, I'm gonna just give in. I'm tired, worn down and at my wits end. Hope she's happy with what she's getting. A bipolar head case with more baggage than a 747 heading to Honolulu.

[Trippin2.0]

Uhm, ok??


Besides not understanding the concept of giving in to a stalker, I'm having trouble understanding why its been possible for her to harass you for nearly 4 years...


Any particular reason why you have not cut ties with this person?

[s4ndm4n2006]

not only is it a bad idea to give in to someone you deem a stalker, it's not right on so many levels

you do not want this woman, you have no desire for her as you imply anyway but you'll let her into your life with the pretense that you're interested so she will find out you're not all she thinks you are? Is that really an honest approach to a bad situation or just piling on deception upon something that is already not a good situation?

I agree that I don't understand how someone could allow anyone to harass them for what, 4 yrs? That's a question I would like to know the answer to also.

[PlannedObsolescence]

I can't get away because she is a co worker. I have talked to management but nothing has every changed. I'm at the end of my rope and just gonna let it all go down the way she has always wanted it to happen. I've just had enough and other than quitting a job that I've had for over 20 years, I'm at a total loss

[Talthybius]

Something is not right here.

If she is really crazy, you wouldn't go visit her just because she is that crazy. That she is on the other side of the world, kinda, also makes me wonder how she can stalk you. And was it really stalking, or is she just really determined.

[Strive4health]

I'm sorry but this is NUTS. If she's stalking you, there is a problem. If I were you I'd quit the job.

I have a feeling if you indulge this woman, she might turn out to be really crazy and things will get much worse than you think. Every single person I've talked to who "caved in" to a person who stalked or pressured them had a relationship that ended badly. I was friends with one woman in particular who, now in her early 50's, has never recovered what she had after the relationship ended.

[~Christina]

This makes absolutely no sense.... not even a speck of common sense.

You say your at a loss??? I don't see why you think you are at this point.

Question if you had a child or family member being harassed like this would you advise them to go ahead and go out with a person like this???

Your thinking is very odd

[BlossomingLen]

I really, really don't agree with your way of thinking. You shouldn't give up now. Just giving in to someone who's stalking you is going to put you into even more danger. It would be better and safer just to keep denying it and running away. This isn't right. I've known someone who was followed all the time when they were at school by another student. She gave this person a chance and she got attacked. That isn't safe, you know.

Obsessive behavior like this isn't healthy. It's also very uncomfortable and just not a safe environment for you to be in. I really don't recommend it.

[PlannedObsolescence]

You are all correct in your thinking. Determined is a much better word than stalking. I posted this during a moment of weakness hoping to get some insight. I'm just worn down from her pursuit. It just feels like sometimes I'll never not have this pressure on me. I just need to move forward and hope that her sights move off me at some point. Thanks for all the input.

[TishaBuv]

Why weren't you interested in her in the first place?

[divine1966]

If she harasses you on a job and management does nothing about it then you should go to higher level management and as high up as a head of the company, if nothing happens then you collect all written complains that you emailed and wrote to your management and go see a lawyer. She can be stopped

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BlossomingLen]

Exactly. If she keeps pestering you to the point of you wanting to give up, then that's terrible. That is harassment. That can be brought into court and you would be able to legally stop her, if there is no other way to prevent it.

[Crazy Hitch]

What are the cost benefits of giving in to her persistence vs. continuing to ignore her?

[PlannedObsolescence]

She was in a relationship so I kept my distance but then she became single and I was just turned off by the persistence.

I've asked management for help but they never seem to care much because it is a very loose work environment. She is not in my department all the time so it's not a constant.

I hope the girlfriend and your kids stay safe. You, too.

[A Red Panda]

You should ask for a copy of your works harassment policy. There should be one.