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#1
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Long story short; I'm in the middle of a depression, and my fiancee is in the middle of grieving for his mother who just passed away at the end of June. I have a great doctor and I think recent adjustments to my meds are helping but I know from past experience that I'm still in that critical stage where the smallest thing can send me tumbling backwards.
I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. I want to be supportive to my fiancee but I'm really struggling to keep my own head above water right now. Have any of you ever had to deal with your own depression plus that of a grieving or depressed partner? Any advice would be appreciated. |
![]() Anonymous37904, Skeezyks
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#2
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Hello whoamihere: Personally, I think the best thing one can do in a situation such as this is to take the best care possible of oneself & to try to find little things to do for one's partner in order to be supportive & to demonstrate that one cares.
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__________________
"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
![]() whoamihere
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#3
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When I have found myself in similar circumstances what has worked for me is to try to find and maintain the point of balance as best as you can. If you slip a little, set down the burden of being there for him for a few minutes. Try to pause and be there for yourself. Be gentle on yourself. Try not to feel to guilty or upset as the best you can do really is the best you can do.
It can be a real teeter totter trying to care for someone in grief while simultaneously maintaining that balance point fighting your own issues so don't do both at once. My advice would be when he's down, try to push off the ground and bring him up as best you can. When your down do your best and hope he pushes you up a bit too. It worked on the playground. It worked for me. Perhaps it might work for you now. I hope it gets easier to you and I hope the support here at our forum can help push you up a bit. |
![]() lizardlady, whoamihere
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#4
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Thank you! All very helpful advice and support. I'm trying not to rely on my fiancé for support right now. So, I really appreciate all the feedback.
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#5
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You're welcome, we are here to support you. Keep us posted here and post in the other forums that apply to you. I see we both have bipolar disorder...the bipolar forum is super supportive. Post away in there for support - we've got your back. You and your fiancé will get through this. xo
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