Serious boyfriend does not want children...

Resentment - yes, good word Christina chose there.

I don't think you can "wait around" to see if he'll change his mind. One partner wanting kids and the other partner not wanting kids ... that's not compatible at all.

I think the greater point than the subject itself is whether or not such a serious issue can even be discussed.

There are very many people who are in a commited relationship or married and don't want kids. Some people just don't want to raise kids. It's nothing to do with love. And it's not right or wrong.

I think people who don't want kids should be with others who don't kids. It's only fair

I think you should find a man who wants children.

Why can't it be discussed? Anything can be discussed

OP said:

Oh I see. My bad. I misunderstood. I thought justfriend said that in general something like this cannot be discussed. I see now that it meant that op cannot discuss it with her boyfriend

Wow, you've got a chance to land you a bartender. You don't want to rock that boat.

Sorry, sorry. I do know that, right now, this seems like a genuine dilemma. And it is. When I was your age, I was every bit as tied up in knots, as you are now . . . over a guy offering less.

This guy is probably not a commiter - not to a kid, and, eventually, not to you. He's prolonging his adolescence as long as he can. Three years away from turning 30, and he's still hanging around the spots that are hot with the young. He's either performing, or he's tending bar. You probably worry that he can replace you easily. At 27, it's still cool to be in the band. It gets less cool, as the years go by. He does what he does because he doesn't want a real job. He's not preparing for a real job. He's living a teenager's dream, and he doesn't want it to end. So he mean's it about not wanting a kid.

Probably none of what I'm saying helps you to feel less in a dilemma. At age 22, I think you can do better. But you're in love. That's hard to walk away from. However, believe it or not, success in life takes more than love. When there's love, but not a whole lot else, it's really not all that. It may take you 15 years to figure that out.

Learn from him. Try to do what he does. Put yourself first. He never will. And that'll get old.