I love to be open about my issues, fears, etc.
But I had experience when such openness was greeted by scolding, anger, advising me without listening.
It just makes you feel that the moment you expose a weakness, the friend will see you as weak forever.

Can someone help me out with this?

I personally don't see someone talking about issues as inferior, but as someone to relate to.

[TishaBuv]

There are some friends you can confide anything and other 'friends' who will hold things against you.

[butterfly24]

More information would help people advise you better. In general, yes, being open and able to talk to people is a good thing. But if there's an extreme of talking about issues, fears, etc., if that's all that's ever talked about, if it's always a one-sided conversation, that might lead someone to become frustrated with that conversation.

Who is it that's scolding you? A parent, a sibling, an older relative, cousin, friend, teacher, counselor, boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse? Someone you know well, someone you were talking to in a grocery line? All of these things make a difference.

[Fuzzybear]

I don't know of anyone who has no issues, or fears.. if someone reacted with anger and "advice" without listening, this is their "stuff" - whatever judgements they may make are irrelevant since they haven't a clue..

I don't get it either, and have faced people like this, some in my own family. I like to think that we are all on the same plane and equal. I don't know what it is about people having issues and people feeling like they are better because they either a. don't have those same issues or b. are too scared to talk about their own issues, which they do have. But I'm sure there's some kind of psychology around it. Talk to people you feel safe around and forget the rest.

Butterfly24 - First of all, by scolding I mean "it's your problem/fault", "you have done nothing", "you are wrong", etc. "Negative criticism" would be a better term. Other than that, giving advice and leaving you to your misery if you say it doesn't work for you, or being angry with you because they feel they can't help because of me.

As for who's talking that way, those are a selective close few, either from family or friend pool.
But I now know to talk about issues with people I trust more on their reactions towards me.

Fuzzybear - you are right. However, when someone is angry with you they see you as the problem, although I have learned that if someone sees or points out problems in you, he sees you negatively and a distance is to be increased.
Everyone has issues and it's true. But I think it's important to talk about issues here and there. That way one can feel less alone.

starrysky - I also love the kind of thought you mentioned - the "equals on one plane".
I love to believe eventually we are all humans, who seek the comfort and love in one another.

Thank you guys

[Medusax]

My parents were both like that about everything. I feel your pain.

[mar33]

This reminds me of my relationship with my mom... especially the part about advising without listening. I will confide something to her that I am afraid to say to anyone, and she'll lecture or yell at me without even listening as if the insecurity I feel is her fault...

I think people who do this are insecure themselves and seek to make up for it by finding joy in the weakness of others maybe...?

It's always confused me when someone could be so kind, and instead they choose to be angry/mean. I am sorry about you're friend, I also think people can find commonality in struggling-after all, that's what this site is for

I feel like this in the real life and to some extent in the cyber world. I feel I lose others' respect if I let them know my weaknesses. It especially hurts when you don't find the expected response. You make yourself vulnerable for nothing.

[AutumnLeaves65]

I understand exactly how you feel. Sometimes I want to talk about feelings so deeply but it's hard because people shrug them off as" move on", "Let it go", or "Don't even give it much thought, you'll be fine". Though I know that is what I should do, I still just want someone to just...listen to me.

[Shadix]

I know exactly how you feel. A large large part of my issue has always been low self esteem and depression brought on by an inability to connect with girls. I was never able to open up about this to anyone because I saw that anytime a guy did open up about this kind of issue, people would react with contempt instead of compassion.