[lifeee112]

Hello. I am a 19 year old girl and I am in a relationship for 4 years now. We both love each other very much, but the only problem is that our parents won't approve our relationship. They say that we can't marry each other, because we're from the same village back in India. Marrying someone from the same village brings a lot of disgrace to both of the families. Our parents are threatening us and saying that they will murder us if we go against this. They have also theeatened us about suiciding if we run away. This really makes me sad and have no idea what to do, I care about my parents, but I really really love my boyfriend and I want a serious future with him. What should I do now?

[CANDC]

'hi lifeee112. Welcome to Psych Central. Sorry you are having problems with difficult parents

You put your location as Netherlands so have you already left your village? That might be a very positive boundary to live in another country.

I am not sure how to cope with that so I will just suggest these articles that might be of interest

https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhaust...istic-parents/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/archiv...sistic-parent/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/archiv...icult-parents/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/underst...olling-mother/

https://pro.psychcentral.com/exhaust...-a-narcissist/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/archiv...sistic-parent/

[Trippin2.0]

I would leave. Not telling u what to do, just saying what I would.

Your parents are blackmailing you with threats of suicide, if they even are drastic enough to go through with it, it wont be your fault, its their choice.

I wouldn't stay and risk being murdered, as much as I love my family, if I were in your shoes, I would choose my life over their's.

[MickeyCheeky]

Suicide? That's really extreme..
I'm sorry you have to put up with this. I'd like to give advice, but I don't really know how things work in India :/

[~Christina]

I would just walk away and start your life with this man you love.

Yes it's hard to walk away from parents but you have a life ahead of you and should go live it.

I'm sorry your going through all this

@OP: Cannot you have a secret relationship with him for a couple more years to be sure of what you want out of life? I mean 19 years old is still very young to get married and to be sure of what she wants in life, and if you make a decision to run away, then things might change between you. Who knows. Many people think they are in love but end in divorce within 5 years. Then you would lose your love and your parents. I'm not saying your parents are right, but maybe you need more time to think about this to be sure. But the threat of killing you is concerning. I'm not sure how serious they are. Exercise discretion in whatever you decide to do to be safe.

[BlueEyedMama]

I think the priority here should be your safety both physically and emotionally. I find it very concerning that your parents are talking about harming you if you go against their will. Do you have someone that you can talk to about this in person? Someone to confide in? I worry about you. Please take care.

[Crazy Hitch]

Well if your parents commit suicide (they won't) that's totally on them.

We are all responsible for our own actions. Including your parents.

They can't blackmail you like this.

This is your life.

This is your future.

You deserve love and happiness.

Go for it!