Telling my parents I don't want to go see my brother

My parents want to have a family trip to see my brother down at his base but I don't want to go. It's hard on me to see him. It's overwhelming. I'd rather stay at home and work then go see him. I want to nip it in the bud before my mom starts planning.

Any ideas on what I can say?

"I cant get the time off from work." Done. Boom.

Can you not just be honest and say that you don't want to go on this trip? You're an adult...they may not be happy with your decision, but they can't force you to go.

Well I can't be as honest as saying all the things he makes me feel when he's around or the fact that I've cut all but one time that he has come over. I'm afraid if I tell them I don't want to go she'll think I don't want to be part of the family. And unaluna she wants me to use my paid time off and she knows that if I ask early enough my work will grant me the time off.

I agree, you don't need to disclose all of the reasons why you don't want to go. If you're unable to express how you feel would your mother respect the fact that you need "time out" from your brother? It does not sound like you'll be ready any time soon to see him.

No, it's not that you don't want to be a part of the family. And if your mother jumps to that conclusion I'd say she's being short sited.

If you can't think of a valid reason why you can't go (work etc because she'll think of a way around it) - I think that, as an adult, it is okay to state that you do not wish to go for the time being.

You are an adult. I don't see why you need to join your parents on trips, regardless where they are going.

If you want to be polite and give them the reason just tell them you will be working and can't take time off that particular weekend because too many people already requested that weekend.

Just tell her you can't get the time off of work. Regardless of whether or not she knows you get PTO, it doesn't mean she knows you get it approved or not. Just tell her someone else is out of the office at the same time and you can't get the time off. Period.

Seesaw

She really won't see that as a valid reason.

I'll tell her that taking time off is too soon after switching to a new position and I need to focus on doing my best and I'll see him when he comes home.

What will happen if she thinks you don't have a valid reason?

I agree with the others.. wish you good luck