[withit]

Went out just three times (3-4hours each time) with this man and I feel I'm 'addicted' to him, lol.

We go out once or twice a week. I'm beginning to like him more and more and wondering whether it's infatuation that'll eventually end..

How do I know it's a deeper attachment rather than a transatory infatuation?

[spal]

You will know with time. If it's the real thing then it will last past two weeks. If not, it won't. If it goes beyond three months then there might be a chance of a loving relationship. A year and there's the possibility of real commitment. Also the "addicted" feeling that you are experiencing is normal in the first stages of both lust or love. That will go away, too, with time. See what's left over. If it's nothing, then it's infatuation. If there's something, well, there's some deeper feeling. Time, time. There's no way you can know now. You'll know later.

[eskielover]

That sounds like good advice from spal.....for sure....it does take time & there is nothing like time to determine what true feelings are. Gut feelings & the fluttery feeling of being excited to be with someone is the first step of knowing that you like the person enough to want to be with them. When you are with them & wanting to be with them more & more is a good sign, but it takes time to get to really know the person, & don't be surprised if there is something that you don't know about the person that might really turn you off from him. If that doesn't happen & time continues & you continue to enjoy being with him, then that is a good sign that there might be more to the relationship.....with even more time.

The key that I found is that if you find things that turn you off & are issues in even the back of your mind....you need to listen to them & figure out if over many many years, you would want to be dealing with the bad things. That is what happened with me & now I have been in a 32 year marriage that shouldn't have been from the start if I had listened to my gut feelings rather than the people around me.

You will know over time if you listen to your true inner feelings & not the emotional driving thoughts that can make you do things you later regret.

Hope some of this makes sense,
Debbie

Yeah, time.

You need to see what he is like when he has had a bad day. He needs to see what you are like when you have had a bad day. You need to see whether you can trust him not to hurt you and vice versa. You need to figure the limits of the relationship - will you talk about stuff okay? Talk about the hard stuff? Will he be good to talk to when you have had a hard day or will you need external friends who you can do that with etc etc etc?

Only time will tell...

[Direction]

All good advice...can't think of anything to add...